


The Ballads of Rebirth

by darlingsdevil



Category: Red Dead Redemption 2
Genre: A spin-off of the ending of rdr2 because Arthur deserved a happy ending, Angst, Basically one big fanfix, Charles Smith is in love with Arthur Morgan but he knows Arthur is in love with his wife, Emotional Healing, F/M, Fanfixtion, Healing, Love, Major Spoilers, Minor Charthur, RDR2, Rebirth, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:08:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 17
Words: 38,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21984181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darlingsdevil/pseuds/darlingsdevil
Summary: (Major Spoilers) In the quiet village of Wapiti, a man was living after being dead to the world. On the other side of those mountains that separated them, his wife was restarting her own life, oblivious to the fact he was still breathing.
Relationships: Arthur Morgan & Charles Smith, Arthur Morgan/Reader, Arthur Morgan/You, Original Male Character/Reader
Comments: 78
Kudos: 143





	1. The Man on The Mountain

**Author's Note:**

> Unhappy with rdr2’s ending? Well this is the story for you.. because Arthur deserved a happy ending too. (This is my first fic on ao3, I also write on mobile so please be kind if the formatting is weird). This story will most likely be 15-20 chapters long. So please, take a seat, grab a box of tissues and some popcorn, because this will be a ride! :D

The midsummer morning was routine for Mother Nature. The light woven through the early misty hours illuminated the life within the forest and created a warm glow throughout. Birds sang through the trees and the wild life bounced happily through the underbrush. The man on the mountain was the strange factor on this usual day.

He had been there for only a few hours. The ruckus of the night disturbed the animals for a few minutes, and the flowers cried for their trampled friends, but it was quiet now, and the man on the mountain was quiet too. His breath was nearly non existent, you would have to look closely to see that he was alive at all. 

But another man had come too, and the wind sighed with relief. The other man was distraught at the sight of the man on the mountain, until he saw his chest slowly rise and fall. After that, the other man picked the sleeping man up, gently as if he was incredibly fragile. And then they were gone, and nature soon forgot about those men on their mountain.

••• 

Although nature had forgotten those men, Wapiti had not. When Charles and an unconscious Arthur rode into the reservation, people began looking curiously to them. 

“Please, please he needs help!” Charles shouts were heard throughout the camp as he sprung off Taima, pulling Arthur down. Arthur’s limp body was loose in Charles’s arm. The women of Wapiti stopped their chores and looked towards Charles, the men still recovering from the Van der Linde gang’s poor choices. 

Charles walked frantically towards Rains Fall’s tent as the older man stepped out. 

“Charles? What is wrong?” Rains Fall asked the worried man, noticing Arthur in his arms.

“It’s Arthur, please you have to help us, he’s sick and hurt.” Charles pulled Arthur closer to him, turning him slightly to show Rains Fall his abused face. Rains Fall nodded slowly and eyed the man in Charles’s arms. He motioned Charles to follow him towards a tent on the outskirts of the village. Charles eagerly followed him, paying close attention to Arthur’s breathing. Rains Fall pulled the flaps of the tent back to reveal a dim lighted room, a small bed lay in the center and various herbs hung from the walls. 

“Please set him down here.” Rains Fall spoke with a certain calmness, pointing towards the bed. Charles gingerly set Arthur down, laying him on his back. 

Rains Fall walked to the outside of the tent where an older woman waited outside, Rains Fall nodded to her and she entered. Charles followed Rains Fall as he walked back to his own tent. He entered, as did Charles and sat down on a wooden chair, it was rickety and old, but it brought him a certain grounding factor that pulled him down from his panic. 

“How long has he been out?” Rains Fall asked after a moment of silence after Charles somewhat regained his composure. 

“I don’t know, a day, maybe two? John Marston stopped by last night and told me what happened. I went to go find Arthur. God, he’s sick. He’s really sick.” Charles mumbled, the thought of Arthur not waking up was nearly unbearable. The idea pulled on Charles’s chest, like a weight had been dropped directly onto his heart. 

Rains Fall pulled out a pipe and nodded. 

“I see.”

They sat in silence for a few moments, Charles’s thoughts flying a mile a minute. Rains Fall’s dark eyes studied him intently, but Charles didn’t notice. 

Despite Rains Fall being a wise man, he knew that some moments were owned to silence, and this was one. It was better to allow Charles to get a hold of his thoughts before they assessed the situation, and Charles knew it too. 

•••

It was dark when the old healing woman stepped outside of Arthur’s tent. Charles quickly got up from the fire he sat at, many of the other people of Wapiti noticed too, but it was none of their concern, Arthur was not one of their own and their debt to him had already been repaid. 

The wise woman rolled her sleeves down, she smelled of a mixture of medicine and natural herbs. There was blood on her sleeves and the apron of her dress was damp. 

“I treated his wounds. He’ll be out for at least another day.” The woman told Charles. He looked towards the opening of the tent, only barely able to make out Arthur inside. He sighed with relief, Arthur was fine for right now, but the woman thoughtfully avoided talking about Arthur’s illness. It was uncertain if he would survive, though his chances drastically improved since being here. Charles’s quick actions saved Arthur’s life, had he been a mere hour or two later he would have found Arthur’s corpse on that mountain, not the living breathing person he had seen moments ago. 

“May I go inside?” Charles asked the woman. He felt the breeze sweep his hair in front of him, it would be cold tonight, and Arthur needed to keep warm, so Charles would take care of the fire all night. 

The woman nodded, looking out towards Rains Fall. The chief walked over to the healer and they began talking quietly about what Charles could only assume was Arthur. 

Charles stepped inside.

The sight of Arthur’s battered face was like a stab in the gut. His best friend, the only man he could ever truly trust was walking on the line between life and death. And it hurt. It hurt bad. Charles had accepted Arthur’s ending when he had left the gang right before all went to hell, but seeing him now was so much worse. 

Arthur deserved so much better than this fate that had been so cruelly placed upon him. But this was his chance at a new life, to the rest of the world Arthur Morgan was dead. To Sadie, to John, to you and even to Dutch, he was dead. But in this small village of Wapiti, a man named Arthur Morgan was alive, but he was no longer the outlaw that everyone else had come to know. For the first time since the beginning of his life, he was truly, wholly Arthur Morgan. He was a new man, since the very first second he accepted his death on that mountain. Arthur Morgan was Arthur Morgan, not the marionette to Dutch Van der Linde, not the cold blooded killer who murdered a man for a few bucks and not the man who had died on that mountain. He was himself, and Charles could see that too. 


	2. Daffodils

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Richfield, the land of new opportunities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This entire fic came to me during opening night of Big Fish the Musical, while I stood in the wings before the first scene haha. If you’re familiar with the book, movie or musical you’ll know what daffodils have to do with it! 
> 
> Ps. I’m so sorry,, idk how to tab on google docs app lol. It annoys me too x(

It had been three months since you had last seen Arthur, and you had come to terms with your husband’s death. You ended up in Richfield, a large city just on the other side of the Grizzlies. Quite literally, there was a mountain between you and your old life. 

You saw Arthur in the bookstore when you pulled a book from a shelf, he was there for a split second staring right back at you through the shelves with a shy smile and twinkling blue eyes that dazzled like Flat Iron Lake. It took your breath away and pure joy and panic swelled in your heart every time. He was there at the end of the street, packing up Boadicea, just around the corner of the saloon, but when you blinked and came to your senses, he was gone. You knew it was insane, and you knew damn well he wasn’t coming back from the grave, but still you relished those moments, only if he was there for less than a second. It was like the winds from the Grizzlies had come down and swept him away, and with those winds, your hope. But those winds brought in the spring air, the ones that began to regrow your garden that had froze over.

Time was a wise healer. Arthur’s death was devastating and painful and everyday you felt the aftermath of your past mistakes. You had only recently been married to Arthur, only two months prior to his death so barely anyone knew that you had taken up the last name Morgan. Still, you kept your answers short when people asked you of your life before Richfield “The City of Opportunity”. You feared someone would recognize you, so you stayed from the more crowded areas of the city. 

Life had been rough since the gang’s demise but things were beginning to look up, you rode with John for a month until you decided Richfield was where you wanted to be. John had enough on his plate, trying to keep him and his family alive in a cruel world, and he wanted to put as much distance as he could between him and wherever the hell Dutch and Micah were. Abigail begged you to stay a little longer with them, but you declined the offer. Richfield was a good of a place as any other. 

Luckily, you were able to find a job at a general store within a few days of getting dropped off in Richfield and you had enough money to rent a small apartment above the general store within two weeks of your arrival there. Richfield was a new industrial city, lots of steel mills, but the people weren’t your average city folk. It was up and coming, so many of the citizens had lived there when it was just a small farming town. The only farms left were the ones on the outskirts of the city, but most of them had been turned commercial. 

Richfield was a new start, you only hoped you could leave that old life behind even if you did still hold onto some hope that Arthur was still alive. That small sliver of wishful thinking was waning everyday, the odds of him making it off that mountain were greatly against him and you had come to terms with it then, but after no word from any of your former friends you began to become worried of your friends fates. 

•••

Arthur’s cough got better with each passing day. It had been three months since Charles pulled a dying Arthur into Wapiti. At the beginning of his treatment, it was horrible, Charles was sure he would wake up one day and Arthur would be dead, but months passed and he hadn’t died yet. 

His coughing was less frequent and with less ferocity, Charles had brought Arthur into the Valentine doctor a week ago, and there had been less fluid in his lungs which was a wonderful sign. Arthur’s body was fighting a hard battle, the recovery was slow and painstaking. The first month was dreadful and he was bedridden, fevers accompanied him frequently creating horrible dreams and delirious moments. He had passed out from coughing the second month once when Charles was out hunting and the healer woman, Mahala had nursed him back to health. 

During the second month, Charles decided to begin building a home four miles south of Wapiti. The people of a Wapiti had given them so much already, it would be rude to take more from a group of people who had already lost so much. 

It was a small cabin near a lake, but it was strong and sturdy. Wildlife was abundant there. Arthur wasn’t quite strong enough for the move yet, but soon he would be. Arthur claimed he was ready to go, but Charles knew better. Arthur was becoming ansty and the people of Wapiti were weary of his long stay and the people Charles and Arthur used to be associated with. 

Charles spoke little of the gang and Arthur hadn’t asked about you, but he sure did think about you. Arthur decided it was the best at the moment if he didn’t seek you out, he would just pull himself deeper into his sickness. It tore at him that he thought this way, that he was so selfish, but it was simply for the best. It was wiser to allow the dust to settle then to kick up even more. Arthur worried for you constantly and he secretly hoped you were searching for him too even if he knew that you presumed him dead. You had both said your goodbyes, and Arthur was fine with being dead to you at the moment. 

•••

“Why do you wear that ring? You’ve never mentioned being married.” Lee asked you one day while you swept the floors of the general store. He had no filter, but he never intentionally said something that would hurt you. 

“It was my husband’s ring.” You said bluntly, continuing with your sweeping. You stopped to fix a jar of peaches that had fallen over and you remembered Arthur’s secret sweet tooth he had, that only you and Jack had known about. 

Lee was taken aback by your short answer, his hands stopped counting the money in the drawer. 

“Oh.. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” His ears burned with shame, cursing his curious tongue. 

“It’s alright.” You said shaking your head. 

It was late at night, the general store had been closed for an hour. A caravan had stopped during the day, and the patrons were rowdy, they messed up the towers of canned foods and didn’t bother to pick them back up so it took even longer to close the store. The caravan was a mirror of the gang, near 25 men and women, a few children. It was bittersweet to see them, even if they had messed up your store, you knew your group was far from civilized. You longed for the days around the campfire, everyone laughing and smiling, but it had been so long since then, and much had changed. 

Lee was a close friend of yours, he was the son of the old man who owned the shop, and the only other worker there. He was playful and teased you a lot, but he was kind and thoughtful. You could tell he was sweet on you, and perhaps you were a little bit as well. It was too soon, Arthur barely dead and you were already blushing around another man. It was shameful. 

You finally finished your sweeping, Lee leaned against the counter, eyeing a butterscotch sweet next to the counter. You sighed. 

“Just take it.” 

Lee grinned like a child, plucking the butterscotch off the small dish. 

He turned around towards the front door, locking it with ease. You turned towards the stairs that led up to your apartment. Lee and his father's apartment was directly below yours. 

Lee quickly opened the door for you, the stairwell was dim. You hated walking up it, it was steep and rickety. The building itself was one of the oldest in the city, it held heavy memories. Lee’s mother had passed away in the house while giving birth to her second child, Lee’s little sister, Anastasia. Anastasia ran away when she was 17, to marry an outlaw. Apparently, that got her killed. Lee received word of her death a few years ago, he hadn’t seen her since the day she left, he didn’t even know where she was buried. The life of an outlaw never ended well. 

Lee never spoke of her much, all you knew was that she was passionate and opinionated, a true wild card and you could tell the outlaw life would’ve done her well. Lee had a strong hate for outlaws and criminals because of it, he still didn’t know about your past and you intended to keep it that way.

Lee’s father was a kind man, he was quiet but you could tell he loved Lee very much. He wasn’t around much, he spent most of his time in his room but occasionally he would help run the shop. 

You reached the platform outside of Lee’s apartment. He stopped right behind you, dangerously close. Your heart pounded in your ears. It didn’t help that the platform was incredibly small either. You turned to face him. 

“Give me your hand.” He said, almost a whisper. You reached out your hand and he placed a small round object on it, under further inspection you realized it was a butterscotch candy. 

You smiled, looking back up at him. He had a shy grin plastered on his face. You were thankful of the darkness of the stairwell, otherwise he would have seen your ferocious blushing. 

“Goodnight, Lee.” You kissed him on the cheek, grasping your candy firmly in your palm, and you calmly made your way up to your apartment, leaving Lee flustered on the doorstep. 

•••

On a particularly warm day, despite it being fall, Arthur arose from his bed to take a walk around the perimeter. Mahala eyed him cautiously but he simply smiled, something he was becoming better at. Mahala had become close with Arthur, she was like another Miss Grimshaw, a tough love mother to him. Charles was out for the day, and Rains Fall was nowhere to be found. It was quiet in the village. 

The sun was bright and the crispness of the air felt wonderful to Arthur. His legs were still tense from lying down for so long, they felt heavy and strange. 

Arthur missed the days of hunting, just getting on Boadicea and riding into the sunset. He missed not being watched every second, Mahala and Charles fretting over him every second. He missed the days where he could spread his wings and fly. He was caged at the moment, and an injured bird cannot fly. An injured bird still has the instinct to soar, even if the owners are particularly kind. 

But Arthur knew this calm, peacefulness was just what he needed. After a life of running, he needed a place to become grounded for once. 

He found himself walking further and further, farther than he’d ever walked before. He found himself at a slow stream, the water trickling over the rocks. The birds sang through the trees and Arthur found himself sitting down next to the water. 

He studied the terrain, wishing he would have kept his journal with him. This was a perfect place for a landscape sketch. The next time Charles went into Valentine, he would have to ask for a new journal. 

On the other side of the stream, there was a bright yellow flower. It was strange to see, it stuck out against the dark greens and grays of the forest. 

“It’s a daffodil.” A voice spoke from behind him, making him jump. Mahala stood next to Arthur, her hands on her hips. 

“What would have happened if something attacked you out here? Could you have fought them off?” She asked the former outlaw, glaring at him like she had caught her child with his hand in the cookie jar. 

“Well I didn’t get attacked, did I? Besides, I was just lookin’ at that flower. What'd you say it was? A daffodil?” He asked, pointing towards the sun colored flower. 

Mahala glared at him before returning her attention to the flower, her gaze softened. 

“Yes. The rebirth flower.”


	3. Mrs. Morgan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mahala is curious. Lee is interested.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’d love to hear more feedback from you guys! Also I’m entirely shooketh that I’m writing this much, I usually never update this quickly but I’m feeling pretty motivated haha.

“I’m fine, Charles. I am, now let me go out hunting, you know I’m just as deadly with a rifle as you are with a bow.” 

“I know, but we’re  _ bow hunting,  _ it’d be like bringing an elephant into the woods and telling it to go sneak up on someone.” Charles pushed Arthur’s chest into the bed, he fell back with a thud. 

“It’s only because you’re still sick. In a couple weeks, I’ll take you out hunting with me, but until then you’re staying here.” And with that, Charles promptly walked out of the tent leaving Arthur annoyed in his bed. 

Arthur hated everyone treating him like he was a baby, and he already always hated people fretting over him in general. You would have laughed at everyone’s attentiveness towards Arthur’s health, while Arthur could do little but just sit there and look pretty. 

He missed you more and more everyday, Charles and Mahala could see the longing for you in his eyes, it was heartbreaking to watch. Mahala knew nothing of you, Arthur’s past was a mystery, but by the way Arthur spoke she knew he was missing his other half, like a record player that could not play any music. 

Even if he missed you, Arthur promised himself he wouldn’t search for you until he was better, which could take many more months. 

Mahala estimated it would take around three more months to fully recover if he didn’t relapse. In three more months you could be on the opposite side of the country, it would take so much longer to find you. But he eventually would, he would begin that journey when he was ready. 

Arthur was slowly gaining weight if he were to prepare for his journey he would need to first maintain a decent weight. His fevers left him with little appetite but Mahala had kept him on a reliable diet that he could usually keep down. Rabbit that Charles hunted, wheat bread and carrots and peppers. Mahala was a good cook, so Arthur never got bored of his daily food. 

It was early in the morning, Mahala usually brought his breakfast in at nine, but she always visited before that. She’d tell him stories of her youth which were surprisingly interesting,her stories were the only thing keeping Arthur sane. He never liked sitting around and being lazy like Uncle, but listening to a story wasn’t exactly just sitting around. Mahala had lots of stories, fables and legends, it always kept him intrigued. 

When seven rolled around, and Charles had long been gone, Arthur could hear Mahala’s cheerful humming from outside the tent. 

“Rise and shine, my son.” She said, ripping open the tents opening. 

“G’morning Mahala. Sleep well?” Arthur mumbled, attempting to sound sleepy. Mahala always got angry when Arthur didn’t sleep in, since he rarely ever slept and if he did it was for very short periods of time. 

Mahala gave Arthur a knowing look, turning away from him. She pulled a small vial out of her bag, Arthur groaned. Medicine. 

“It’s your favorite,” she said in a sing songy voice, putting some on a spoon. Arthur grabbed the spoon from her nimble hands. He shoved the spoon in his mouth. It was bitter and awful and he nearly choked on it every time. 

“Swallow it.” She said sternly, glaring at him. He obliged and felt the viscous liquid fall down his throat. It was his least favorite part of Mahala’s visits, minus the coughing fits and fevers. 

She sat down next to Arthur’s bed, setting her bag down next to her. Glass vials clinked in her leather bag, it was old and worn and held lots of medicine for Arthur. He wasn’t sure what he took everyday, never bothering to ask, even if he did, he wouldn’t understand it. It was some sort of herbal mixture, but tasted like it was left out in the sun for hours and had turned rancid. 

“Today I want to hear a story from you.” Mahala began after she noticed Arthur had drank the medicine. 

It felt like the air had been sucked from his lungs, something he had unfortunately become accompanied with in the last few months. She had never asked of his past. He hadn’t even prepared an answer, expecting . Even if he knew he would never lie to Mahala, knowing she could see through it instantly, he could still avoid the full truth. 

“A story about me?” He asked with a light chuckle, sitting up. Mahala nodded. 

“Well I’m not that interesting. I ain’t got much to tell.” 

“I’m sure you’ll think of something.” She told him. 

He thought for a moment, deciding what was the safest to tell, interesting but not risky. She eyed the small gold band on his finger, the only thing besides Charles that anchored him to his past. 

“Tell me about her.” 

“You wanna know about Mrs. Morgan?” 

“Yes. You’ve never spoken of her. Was she dull? Is that why you’ve never talked about her?” Mahala tilted her head in humorous curiosity. 

“No, no, she’s far from dull.” He laughed, shaking his head. A small smile splayed on Mahala’s lips. 

“She was wonderful, kind and beautiful. A compassionate heart, but boy, if you got her mad you’d better be praying.” Mahala listened to every word he said. 

“Once.. once I’d forgotten to lay my socks out to dry and gotten sick from it, she didn’t let me rest for one minute. She was fuming, but she still kept care of me.” It had been years ago, long before either of you had confessed your feelings but he remembered it like it was yesterday. It felt good to speak about you, like a large weight had been pulled off of his chest. He felt lighter. 

Mahala laughed at the story, she had never been married, claiming a man could not handle her ideas. A pang of happiness struck her heart, Arthur was like her son, and to see him be open and smile around her was wonderful, but she could still tell he was keeping the full truth from her. 

“It seems like she was good for you.” 

“Yeah, I think she is.” 

“My, my child. Is she alive or dead? You speak of her in different pretenses, I cannot tell.” Mahala, ever the curious cat was incredibly broad, perhaps too broad for her own good. 

Arthur let out a heavy sigh, not realizing he’d been holding it in this entire conversation. 

“I’m not too sure to be honest. We got separated a few days before Charles found me, Charles doesn’t seem to know where she went. She could be halfway across the country or six feet in the ground by now.” 

Mahala pursed her lips tightly. 

“You’ll find her, lovers always find a way back to each other.” 

“Don’t give me that sappy stuff, Mahala. The world don’t work like that.” 

“Believe what you will, but I’m sure you’ll find her. I can see the love in your eyes for her.” 

Arthur had heard that from Hosea on the night he proposed to you, after you had gone to bed for the evening and Arthur was still up drinking with the few men who were still awake in celebration. It was right before everything went to shit, and the entire gang was forced out of Blackwater. It was only him, Hosea, Dutch and John who were awake, the true Van der Linde family, the only missing piece was you. Drunk Arthur didn’t remember much of the rest of the night besides that one comment. 

“ _ I see your love for her in your eyes. They twinkle more, it’s like you’re finally seeing the bigger picture. A love like that can’t be broken by death, and god knows death comes quickly and often in this life.”  _

•••

“Lee, can you pick that up for me?” You pointed towards a can of green beans that had fallen down, since you were at the cash register helping a rather moody customer. 

“Yes, Ma’am.” He picked up the green beans, and instantly returned to restocking. Lee had been acting strange all day, he avoided your eye and spoke to you only when talked to first. It wasn’t like him at all. You were sure it had something to do with your kiss on the cheek last night. You smiled at the thought of him becoming weak at just a peck on the cheek, it was how Arthur used to be as well at the beginning of your relationship. 

Today had been awful, two customers had yelled at you for running out of items and one, you realized later, had stolen multiple cans of food. The general store was already hurting after a newer one had been put up. It was a chain store, so everyone wanted to go see what all the fuss was about. You hadn’t told Lee about the crook who took the food, and you were still deciding if you were going to. You had stolen food countless times while in the gang, it felt so much worse when you were on the opposing end. 

When the shop finally closed, it was just you and Lee again. He was still nervous to be around you, moving to the opposite side of the room to ‘sweep’ when you moved closer to him. 

Around ten minutes after being closed, he cleared his throat. You look up at him, putting the money you were counting on the glass shelf. 

He stared at you with big brown eyes. 

“Can I take you on a date, Mrs. Morgan?” Lee asked you with sudden confidence. 

You froze for a moment, you eyes staring off at the window behind him. For a second, you thought you saw Arthur, standing there behind Lee. 

“I’ll take you down to the restaurant, the one that just opened by the pier,” Lee’s sudden confidence was destroyed by your silence. 

You liked him well enough, but were you really ready for that type of commitment again? Arthur was barely dead, you had mourned for him while he was living, since he had pushed you away as soon as he got sick. It was like he was a ghost the minute he had found out about his diagnosis. Arthur did his damn best to make sure you made it out okay, even if it meant pushing you away to keep you safe. Your biggest regret was not staying with him through it all, no matter his protests. 

“I’d love to go with you.” 

You could finally let go of Arthur, the final thing holding you back. He would have wanted you to move on, to see you happy. 

And you were happy right now, you felt contempt with your life for the first time in a long time. 

  
  



	4. The Locket

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A heartfelt moment at the pier. Strange dreams in Wapiti.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can y’all feel the build up? >:3c I finally finished plotting the entire story >>>>>:3c

It was Sunday, the general store closed early, giving you extra time to get ready for your date with Lee. You still felt awful about falling for a man so soon, but Arthur had been dead for a long time, he was dead the moment he had learned of the disease that would eventually kill him. And it hurt, every second it hurt seeing him waste away, but he would never risk pulling you down with him. He wouldn’t ever sentence you to that. Perhaps it lessened the pain of the goodbye, and it did. You felt guilt that you had recovered so quickly, but people never truly recover from losing the person they love the most. Arthur haunted your dreams and your thoughts, what you could or could not have done to make the inevitable outcome somehow come out differently. 

But it was time to love again. You were ready. 

Lee was waiting for you downstairs. You had bought a new dress that you had been saving up for Christmas, but you decided there would be many more Christmases, today was a unique day. 

The dress was beautiful, emerald green with a black collar that buttoned up in front. The skirt was bouncy and fell to your feet. 

You eyed the locket that held a photo of Arthur in it that you wore everyday, it was like a piece of you. The front was gold, with a small pearl in the center, on the inside was Arthur. Abigail bought it for you and you had put a small photo of him inside, long before you were married. 

Would it be wrong to bring a photo of your dead husband on your date? Arthur was still a part of you no matter what, he was still a large piece of history and if Lee didn’t like that, he could find someone else. 

You pulled the locket around your neck, feeling much more relieved. It was a relic of comfort and always made you feel safe. You found your coin purse and made your way down the steps. 

Your breath was stolen from your lungs. Lee was stunning. He had a wide smile, one that you had learned to love in the last few weeks. He was wearing a dashing gray suit, that complimented his brown eyes. His usual unruly brown hair was combed down. 

“You look amazing.” He blurted out, still a large grin on his face. You blushed at his words, feeling like a teenager when you used to sneak glances at Arthur while he worked. Very rarely he would ever notice you, but Dutch would sneak up behind you and scare the living daylights out of you everytime. Dutch and Hosea teased you to no end about liking Arthur, while Arthur was oblivious to your very obvious crush.

“You look handsome yourself.” You giggled, pulling your gloves on. It had gotten rather cold in the last few weeks, but not nearly cold enough for a jacket. 

You heard the heavy steps of Lee’s father, Mr. Rinascita, coming downstairs. He smiled at the sight of you too. 

“I’m so glad you have finally gotten the nerve to ask her out, Leroy. I’m proud of you.” He said as he made it to the last step. 

Lee was much taller than Mr. Rinascita, towering at least half a foot above him. It was hard to imagine a little Lee, since he was so tall. You couldn’t exactly picture Arthur and Lee standing side by side, so you wouldn’t be able to pinpoint who was taller. 

Mr. Rinascita placed a hand on your shoulder. 

“There’s not another person in the world who I could trust to take care of my son.” He said with a smile. 

“Ah, dad. You’re embarrassing her. Come on let’s go.” Lee laughed at his father's comment, and he took your hand and nearly raced out of the door. 

“You kids be safe out there!” Mr. Rinascita shouted behind you. You laughed as he pulled your arm through the streets and only stopped when you’d reached the corner. He let go of your hand for a moment, and looked as if he wanted to say something but he didn’t, instead he took your hand again and you made your way to the pier. 

When you arrived at the pier, the sun was just beginning to set. It was breathtaking. The sky was a brilliant pink and orange and the clouds added beautiful accents to the vibrant sky. The dark waters reflected the colors making it somewhat even more prettier. It was truly a sight to see. 

People laughed along the pier, couples strolled by and children weaved through the people. The pier was so full of life, you had only visited it once, you feared someone might have recognized you, but right now you had no worries. 

The restaurant came into view, there was some outdoor seating, but it looked incredibly packed. You suddenly felt queasy at the sight of so many people in one room, people who could recognize you. 

“Lee?” You whispered as the restaurant came closer and closer. Your grip on his arm tightened. 

“Yeah?” 

“Can we turn back? I think I’d like just to walk along the boardwalk instead.” You looked visibly uneasy and Lee instantly stopped. 

“Of course.” He didn’t mind at all, the restaurant was expensive and he was prepared to buy you whatever you liked but he would never want to make you uncomfortable. 

The boardwalk was less cramped, and you instantly felt relieved. The lapping of waves along the shore was incredibly soothing and it began to put your nerves at ease. 

Lee took you to the end of the boardwalk, it was at least a mile from shore, which meant fewer people wanted to walk that far to the end, leaving you and one elderly couple at the end. 

You talked and laughed for a few minutes, it was lighthearted and fun until the air shifted into a more heavier topic. 

It was silent for a moment, but the lack of words was welcoming. Some moments were owned to silence, and this was one. The sunset dipped below the shoreline, it reminded you of Flat Iron Lake, the same place Arthur had proposed to you. It was similar to this day, the air was sweet and mild, it was late September and you were along the beach. Few people were out that day too, it was only you and Arthur. 

“Lee, did I ever tell you about my late husband?” You finally broke the silence. Perhaps it was strange to bring up your dead husband on your first date after his passing, but Lee deserved to know the truth even if it was heavy. You couldn’t go on avoiding telling him forever, it wouldn’t be right. 

Lee shook his head slowly. He knew you were weary of your past, and his eyes asked you if you were ready to tell that tale. 

“His name was Arthur Morgan and he was an outlaw.” 

Lee’s eyes widened in disbelief, the people he had grown to hate, the ones who he could never seemingly escape. 

And so you told him everything. Everything. From the very beginning, how the Van der Linde gang became your family, how it fell apart and how Arthur saved everyone he loved, and he redeemed himself in the end. 

And Lee listened, he held onto every word you said. By the end tears fell from your eyes like diamonds. It felt so wonderful to let everything you’d been holding back out. A heavy weight had been lifted from your shoulders. 

When the sun finally went down, Lee finally spoke. He let you finish your entire story and only then did he interrupt. 

“We’ve all lost someone. You have, I have. I know you and your people have done awful things, but I don’t see that in your eyes anymore. You don’t have the eyes of a murderer, you have the eyes of a woman who’s seen so much and come out stronger and kinder on the other side.” He cupped your face in his strong hands. Tears fell freely from your face. Your eyes glistened like the river you stood on. 

The wind picked up around you and the air changed. 

And then he kissed you.

And time stood still. 

•••

When time resumed, Mahala had the strangest dream about Arthur. A storm was brewing in the north, just beyond the mountains that lay between Wapiti and the northern states. Static rose in the air. She watched Arthur from a birds eye view and he shouted the name of his wife, but his voice was lost to the oncoming storm. 

Mahala rushed to Arthur’s tent, knowing fully he would still be awake. Arthur was her unruly son, she knew if he was awake or not. When she found herself in his tent, Arthur was sketching a photo of a daffodil on the journal Charles had bought for him. 

He looked up towards her, expecting to be yelled at for not sleeping. 

“You must find your wife, Arthur. Something big is happening in her life, you must search for her soon.” Mahala said frantically. 

“What? What are you talking about Mahala? Slow down.” He stood up, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“You must find your wife before it’s too late.” She had finally caught her breath, placing a hand on Arthur’s shoulder and looked him directly in the eye. 

“If you don’t move quickly it will be too late.”

“What do you mean too late? I don’t even know where she is, she could be dead.” 

“She’s alive, I felt it in my dream. But there’s been a huge change in her life and it could cut you out of the picture completely.” 

Slight panic rose in the back of Arthur’s throat, or perhaps it was guilt. He could have sought you out the moment he woke up on the first day of his treatment. If something happened to you and he hadn’t found you in enough time, would it be his fault? Would he have to carry that burden for the rest of his life, because he was too selfish to look for you while he recovered? 

“I can’t look for her yet, I’m not ready. I’m not ready to bring back those feelings and those memories.” Arthur’s voice wavered as he sat back down on his bed. 

“There will never be a perfect time for anything, it’s all up to you to take that leap when the time feels right.” Mahala left directly after that, leaving Arthur to ponder her words. 

Mahala was right, anything that could go wrong will go wrong, there was never a perfect time for anything. And perhaps it was time, time to finally find his wife.


	5. A Brewing Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The road to rehabilitation usually comes with relapses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is always appreciated! Also, do you guys like Lee? Personally I love him but no one has ever really commented about him! And.. idk if any of you’ve noticed but I love putting similarities between the different POV’s lol and I put a lot of symbolism into names and where people go haha 
> 
> Contemplating writing another chapter tonight.. >:3c 
> 
> I have this really good song that I found that is basically this story.. but I can’t reveal it yet bc of spoilers lol

Arthur couldn’t sleep. Again. It was a routine occurrence, but tonight was different. Mahala’s words stuck to him, and that’s the only thing he could think of. 

The moon was bright and the stars looked wonderful under the midnight backdrop. They twinkled and dazzled. The air was crisp and mild. 

Charles had arrived home from his weekend hunting trip, bringing back lots of game that would feed himself and Charles for many more weeks. Rains Fall expected them to feed themselves, and the people of Wapiti kept out of their business as they did the same. Charles tended to the fire at the very edge of the village, where land met forest. 

Arthur had learned to hate the smell of smoke. It stung his healing lungs and made it harder to breathe, but it kept him warm. So he kept his distance from the blazing fire. 

The wind changed and smoke blew into Arthur’s face, he choked on the bitter air. Dark eyes filled with worry flew to Arthur’s face. The wind changed its direction again but Arthur didn’t stop coughing. 

Air forcefully ripped itself from Arthur’s battered lungs. He couldn’t stop coughing, panic rose in his chest. Charles came to Arthur’s side. 

“I’m getting Mahala,” Charles said quickly, running to the healer woman’s tent. 

Mahala, wearing a nightgown and holding a lantern rushed to Arthur’s side while he fell to the ground. Splatters of blood littered the dirt creating an abstract painting. The corners of the breathless man’s eyes filled with black until all light got blurry. 

And then all went black.

•••

Lee took you back to the general store, the moon was bright and illuminated your blushing faces. Barely anyone was out in the streets, except for the occasional drunken man stumbling through the cobblestone alleyways. It wasn’t a terribly long walk from the pier to the store, but Lee still held you close and had an iron grip around your arm. He was nervous about you being alone at night, perhaps forgetting you used to be a wanted outlaw. Richfield was becoming more and more dangerous though, word had gotten around of the money being created in this town and criminals flocked to new, rich places. Richfield was no emerald city, but it was still a splitting image of the advancement and achievements of the industrial new world. 

He nearly shoved you through the door, taking a second glance at the street, locking the door directly after that. 

Lee turned around and smiled, pulling you closer to him. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this,” He whispered in your ear. You leaned in and kissed him again, wrapping your arms around his neck. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach. His lips were soft and the kiss was filled with passion. Lee lifted you on the glass counter, putting both hands on either side of your hips. 

“Ahem.” 

You both snapped your heads away from each other, looking at the person who interrupted you. It was Mr. Rinascita, looking smugly at the both of you. 

“Sorry dad.” Lee said sheepishly, pulling himself away from you. You fixed your dress and pulled your locket to the center of your chest. 

Mr. Rinascita chuckled, before going back up the stairs. You both watched him make it through the apartment door, staying absolutely still and quiet. 

You both busted out laughing, and a large blush formed on your face. You covered your mouth with your hand in an attempt to silence your hysterical giggling. 

After you somewhat silenced yourself, Lee leaned in and once again your stomach filled with butterflies. It felt like being with Arthur all over again, like nothing could ever harm you and nothing could ever pull you apart. 

“It’s getting late.” Lee said when he pulled himself from your lips.

“I know.” You fluttered you eyes closed, leaning in for another kiss. Lee’s kisses were like a drug, and you were addicted. 

But your lips were met with cold air, and you slowly opened your eyes. 

“It’s time for you to go to sleep, it’s been a long day.” He told you, his eyes were warm and caring. It’s like you could get lost in the depth of his eyes, they were like a thick forest filled with fog, mysterious and intriguing. 

You nodded slowly, tiredness suddenly pulled at your body, making it feel heavy. It was strange, you hadn’t been tired all day until he finally had said something. Lee helped you up the stairs, it was like you blinked and were suddenly in your bed. 

Lee planted a small kiss on your head. 

“Stay with me, Lee.” 

He turned slowly, giving you a small head shake. 

“You’re too tired.” He said clicking off the light, leaving you alone in your bed. You weren’t alone for long though, Arthur appeared in your dreams and he had a message for you. 

•••

“Goddamn it. I was sure he was getting better. My poor son deserves to have something good happen for once.” 

“He’s been through so much, he deserved to heal.” Charles agreed. They both sat next to unconscious Arthur, paying close attention to the rise and fall of his chest. Arthur shivered from fever, so Mahala had thrown all the blankets she could find on him. She would make sure Arthur fully recovered if it was the last damn thing she would ever do.

“You know he can’t stay here any longer.” Mahala spoke in a soft voice, the fire reflecting in her worn dark eyes. 

Charles was silent for a moment. 

“I know. The house is ready, but I can’t take care of him, I don’t know the first thing about medicine.” Charles sighed, leaning back into the rickety chair he first found himself in. 

“I’ll stay with you two, who else would take care of my mischievous boys?” Mahala smirked. 

They became silent again, and worry filled Charles’s head. Arthur fought so hard for his family’s freedom, and he had danced with death too many times. Arthur spoke of settling down once, and how he longed for life to be peaceful for once. Arthur deserved that life, and Charles would do the best of his ability to help Arthur achieve that. 

“I can tell you care for him a lot, Charles.” Mahala finally broke the silence, her words cutting through the heavy air. 

Charles nodded slowly, keeping a respectful watch on Arthur. 

“His wife does too.” 

“Well she is not here.” 

“She doesn’t know he’s alive, Mrs. Morgan is incredibly strong, I’m sure she’s still out there fighting.” He was slightly taken aback by Mahala’s observations. Had it been that obvious?

“She needs to come home, to Arthur. I can see the longing in his eyes for her. I’m sure that gang of yours is spread out all over the country now.” She spoke with sincerity. 

“Truth be told, I don’t know where any of them are at. If I knew where she was I’d get her sent on the first train ride home.” 

“Arthur’s too weak to look for her. She needs to find him. Something big is happening in his wife’s life, I could feel it when I was with him. His spirit reflects hers.” 

“I wish I could send word out to John Marston. The man who visited here the day I found Arthur, she was riding with him at the time. All I know is they were heading north, beyond the Grizzlies and god knows there’s barely any cities in those mountains, she has to be on the other side.” 

Arthur’s eyes began to flutter. A small groan escaped his lips. Mahala shifted in her seat, watching him intently. 

“My girl is in the mountains?” Arthur’s hoarse voice mumbled, still half asleep. Mahala leaned over and put a finger to Arthur’s lips. 

“You need to sleep, my son.” She silenced him and Arthur drifted back off into a deep slumber. 

His dreams were haunted by you. 

•••

_ “Arthur! Arthur!” Your voice split through the storm, Arthur couldn’t see anything a few feet in front of him. The harsh rain splattered onto his body, making him incredibly cold.  _

_ You heard him shout your name, and you followed it, continuing to shout his.  _

_ “Arthur, please, find me!”  _

_ And the rain stopped, and the sky cleared.  _

_ Arthur was standing right in front of you. His eyes filled with happiness.  _

_ “I need you to find me.” Your voices rose in unison.  _

_ “Before it’s too late.”  _


	6. Life, Liberty and The Pursuit of Happiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the sun rises, you shall be reborn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow heavy chapter lol! I wrote this last night actually, directly after I wrote chapter 5 so chapter 7 might be up tonight. I’m really trying to finish this otherwise I never will so I’m using all my brain power to complete it lol.

It had been four months. Four months of sleepless nights, passing out from lack of oxygen, fevers, constantly having to change sheets that were soaked with sweat or blood. He had walked through hell two times now, and still remained breathing. 

But in the fourth month, he felt no rise of a cough in the back of his throat. The air was sweeter and clearer, the Valentine doctor had explained that there was no fluid in his lungs, and that they sounded fully healed. 

Arthur was free, for the first time he was a free man. He had been reborn on that mountain top with a shackle around his wrist, but that shackle had been broken the moment the doctor diagnosed him tuberculosis free. 

His body was healed, but his mind was not. 

To become so sick you were bedridden for a total of three months was incredibly tiring and took a huge toll on his mind. He was distant, did nothing much besides sleep. Charles tried to get him to go hunting with him, but he wouldn’t. He hated sitting around, but he didn’t have the willpower to get up and do anything else. Mahala kept her distance though, she knew Arthur had to fight this internal battle alone. She still told him stories every morning, he tried to listen but his mind was filled with thoughts of you. 

He worried for you constantly. Had his relapse indirectly affected you? Were you dead because he wasn’t there to save you? Mahala assured him you were still alive, but he was still wary of that statement. 

They had moved into Charles’s home the first week after his relapse. He dozed in and out the entire ride, despite it being only a few miles. Arthur had a small room, it held a few photos of you, love letters that you’d given him, your engagement ring that you gave back to him after you’d been married, and a vase of daffodils on his bedside. 

Mahala entered his room while Arthur lay in his bed, watching the sunset. It wasn’t uncommon for her to occasionally barge in but today was different. 

“Arthur,” She said softy, standing in the doorway. He slowly glanced over, sitting up when he noticed her solemn expression. 

“I need you to find your wife. I want you to be happy. When the sun rises in the morning, I want you to embark on that journey to find her.”

Arthur stayed silent, watching her in wonder. 

“Goodbye, my son. Do not let this sadden you, when the sun rises I hope you will feel at peace.” She said quietly, walking over to him and kissing him on the forehead. Her kiss was warm and loving, and left Arthur’s cold body no longer shivering. She left, closing Arthur’s door, leaving him confused and tired, he returned back to watching the sun. 

His window faced the setting sun as it dipped below the mountains, so every evening he pulled himself out of bed to watch it. Even when it was snowing he would look at it. He wondered if you watched the same sunset as he did. Sunsets were yours and Arthur’s. 

•••

Lee was sick with the cold, so you had kept him barricaded in your room. It was late December, and the holiday season had taken a toll on both you and him, but he was the one who got sick.

Mr. Rinascita held the fort down, until he eventually decided to shut the shop down early. Lee was stubborn and claimed he could go downstairs to work, but after he had tried to stand up and promptly fell over, that shut him up. 

You fed him Pearson’s ‘old sick remedy’ as he had called it, which was really just chicken broth with parsley in it. But it seemed to do the trick, and he fell asleep while the sun was setting. 

It had been so long since you had watched a proper sunset, just by yourself. It was a sunset that Arthur would have liked,, even if it was unbearably cold. You sat on the bay window, overlooking the people on the streets. But soon, the people didn’t matter and all that was left was the setting sun. What you loved the most about sunsets is that every day it was something new, like the sun had been reborn overnight, always setting at a different time, different colors and different people watching it. 

You slowly popped open the gold locket hanging on your chest, listening to Lee’s soft snores. There was a photo you had been keeping in a small box of all your old memorabilia, Arthur’s sketches of you, pressed flowers, your old gun, photos of the gang and a photo of Lee you had begged him to take. It was small enough to put inside the locket, so you did. Now there were two men who were encased inside you heart, Lee and Arthur. Both incredibly different, but they had one thing in common, their kindness and love for you. 

While you had let go of Arthur and allowed yourself to heal, you would always love him. He always held a piece of your heart, but you couldn’t let yourself be held down by a man who was dead any longer. It was time to fully allow yourself to love Lee, without the guilt of still holding onto Arthur. 

Tomorrow, when the sun rose, you would tell Lee all about him. And you would finally allow yourself to truly love the man who had owned your heart for months now. 

•••

Mahala died in her sleep. Charles found her in the early morning. 

They send word out to Wapiti. 

They held a small ceremony for her. Arthur was going to buy daffodil seeds when spring came.

Men of Wapiti came to retrieve her body, they would bury her and honor her tonight in the village, but Arthur felt no need to go, he had already said his own goodbye. 

Charles locked himself in his room. Arthur stayed outside while snow fell over the terrain. Mahala had mentioned once that she loved winter, for the Earth died and it would begin its new life in spring. 

He felt undeniably numb, until he came to his bedroom. 

Grief hit him like a tidal wave, rage and turmoil racketed off his head and he could nearly feel the energy that surrounded him as the anger rolled off. 

He felt his outlaw days creeping up on him, when his rage led to bloodthirsty decisions. His fists were so tightly clenched he felt his knuckles straining underneath the intense pressure. 

And then he released his hands, and calmness spread over him like a blanket. He fell onto his bed, allowing his eyes to shut. The light began to fade as the sun shifted into its setting cycle. And he watched it again, just as he did every other night. 

•••

The sun rose in the morning, you fell asleep next to Lee, exhausted. Lee was already awake cooking you breakfast and humming a small tune, for a split second in your dazed mind, you saw Arthur standing there instead. 

You rubbed your eyes gently. It was time to pour your heart out, and a cup of coffee. 

“Lee?” You groggily asked, pulling the covers from your body. It was freezing, despite it being unbearably hot in the apartment all the time. 

“Yeah?” He scrambled some eggs, putting some pepper on his own. 

“I need to tell you something.” 

He glanced back, you were already right behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist. 

“What is it?” 

You felt instant regret, this probably wasn’t the best time to tell him something that was so important.

“I’ll tell you after breakfast.” You pecked him on the cheek, removing yourself from his waist. 

Breakfast was lighthearted and delicious. You giggled at Lee’s silly flirting. Lee moved out of his father's apartment and into yours a month ago, he officially asked you out on your second date, which was only two days after the first. 

Just as quickly as breakfast had been served, it was over, but the time didn’t feel correct. Lee, already ready for the day, took your plate and promptly fell into the bed directly after that. 

You shimmied in next to him, relishing his warmth. A day like this reminded you of when the gang had nothing to do that day, so you could sleep in with Arth-

_ No. Lee.  _ Today you could stay in with Lee, not Arthur. Arthur wasn’t here, and he would never be here again. 

“Lee?” You whispered, laying your head against his chest. 

“Mhm?” He responded, fiddling with a strand of hair that was splayed across him. 

“I..” you trailed off, staring at the bland bedsheets. 

“What is it, my love?” He asked you. Your heart swelled with love, just by one simple question. 

You looked into those deep eyes again, the ones that you got lost in time and time again. 

“I think I’m in love with you.” 

You leaned up to kiss him. It was like your first real kiss, your first free kiss. Away from all the pain and suffering of your past life, just by a simple sentence that held so much weight, you were finally free. 

Lee pulled away, smiling. His mysterious eyes were filled with warmth and passion. 

“I think I’m in love with you too.”    
  
  



	7. Letters of Misfortune

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A letter arrives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can’t wait till next chapter >:3c

Charles hadn’t seen much of Arthur since Mahala’s death. Arthur didn’t deal with grief like other people did. He never had the chance to grieve before, he was too busy with helping the gang to ever grieve. The process was new to him. 

He spent as much time as he could away from Charles’s home. He only returned in the late hours of the night, long after Charles fell asleep. Charles was never sure where Arthur went, the only telltale sign of Arthur ever returning home was the occasional note, telling Charles he would be out for a few days. 

Arthur visited post offices around the states the gang had last visited. Everyday was a new post office. The mailmen were familiar with Tacitus Kilgore, the second Arthur stepped into the post office they would shake their heads. Arthur wasn’t sure what letter he was looking for, perhaps one from John, Sadie or you. It was risky business traveling around the states, especially with the threat of Dutch and Micah possibly lurking around. But no one ever recognized him. He held himself in a manner that was entirely from the old Arthur, people would have to truly take a good look to recognize him. 

It was two months of searching, until he finally just told the post office masters to send any letter he received to the Valentine post office. He couldn’t truly embark on that journey to find you without any clues. He was going to honor Mahala’s last wishes if it was the last damn thing he ever did. Arthur was no religious man, but he prayed that he would find you one day and that a clue to your whereabouts would soon appear. He knew you were smart enough to get the hell out of anywhere the gang had last been, in case Dutch was lurking around. He thought it was strange that John had sent no letter to Charles though, considering that John knew where Charles last resided. 

Arthur swallowed his pride and returned home to Charles after not finding any letters addressed to Tacitus Kilgore at the Valentine post office. He felt strange as he stood on the doorstep of the quaint home. Taima stood hitched by the tree, so Charles was definitely home. 

He clutched the seed packet of daffodils in his hand, contemplating whether he should knock or just enter. Arthur lived here too, but he hadn’t been home in so long he didn’t want to spook Charles. 

“Arthur!” A voice shouted from behind him. Charles. 

Charles came quickly to Arthur, hugging him tightly. 

“I’ve missed you. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you.” Charles laughed to his friend, releasing him. 

“I know.” Arthur laughed along with him, still feeling strange.

They were silent for a moment, both men studying each other. 

“Well, welcome back.” Charles said with a smile, opening the door for Arthur. 

“Glad to be back.” Arthur said as he set down his satchel on the table. 

“I have a letter. John sent it to me a day ago.” Charles said from behind him, hanging his coat up. 

Arthur turned around, eyeing the ripped open letter in Charles’s hand. Charles handed it to Arthur, leaving Arthur to read the letter by himself. 

He slowly pulled the letter out from the envelope, his hands shaking in anticipation. It was definitely John’s crude handwriting. It was like John wrote with his less dominant hand, while on a horse, and being chased by a pack of wolves while doing it. Arthur was never so glad to see his brother’s terrible handwriting.  
  


_ 2/18/00 _

_ Charles,  _

_ Abigail, Jack and I are in Detroit. I’m sorry for the late letter, but we’ve been so busy with the move. We’re hoping to head out to Canada. No one has recognized me yet, but I’m known for having a bad streak for people recognizing me and causing trouble, so I won’t be surprised if we’ll have to move again.  _

_ Sadie is in Illinois. We met her a few weeks back during our travels in Chicago. She’s starting a bounty hunting business apparently. I’m sure that work will treat her well.  _

_ Arthur’s wife is in Richfield. A city on the other side of the Grizzlies. If you visit her, you can’t miss the city, it’s big and upcoming. I haven’t had the time to send her a letter either, but I’m sure she’s doing well. Mrs. Morgan is a persuasive spirit. I’m sure she’s doing just fine with her new found life.  _

_ I’m not too sure how long we will be staying here, so please send a response soon. I hope you’re doing alright, Charles.  _

_ Regards,  _

_ John _

Arthur had never felt so many emotions hit him at once. He felt ecstatic, nervousness, love, a thousand things. You were alive. You were settling down, something Arthur had always wanted for you. He prayed you were still in Richfield. Arthur was sure you were still running scams and causing mischief in this sparkling new city, like you always did.

“It seems like you’ll be leaving me again.” Charles entered the room again. Arthur gingerly set the letter down, as if it were the most valuable thing in the entire universe. 

“I have to look for her.” 

“I know. I hope you find peace with her, Arthur. I’m sure she’s still waiting for you too.” 

Arthur gripped onto his friend’s words like they were something precious, leaning against the table. 

“But first, you have to plan this out. If you don’t find her within a month you’re coming back and we’ll wait for another letter.” Charles said, giving him a knowing look. He was right though, if Arthur didn’t find you he’d end up in Richfield looking for you forever. 

“I’ll take the next train out. If I don’t find her within a week, I’ll come right back. If I find her, I’ll take her home.” 

•••

“Mr. Rinascita?” You called out from the front of the store. Lee’s father went to go retrieve a restock of apples from the back room, but he was gone for ten minutes, no sounds came from the back room either, making you worry. It was deathly quiet. You waited until the customer you were helping had left to search for him. 

It was only you and Mr. Rinascita at the store today, Lee was meeting with some suppliers down by the pier to discuss business, but he promised he would be back by three, and it was two-thirty. 

You stepped into the dimly lit room, and Mr. Rinascita lay against the floor, breathing heavily. You rushed to his side, helping him up. 

“Doctor.” He mumbled, his head laying limply on your shoulder. 

You leaned him against the counter as you flipped over the open sign on the door, pulling him out of the door as quickly as you could. 

The doctor was on the same street as you, luckily being one of the few original buildings in the city meant that they were all on the same street. 

You nearly burst into the doctor's office, you struggled to hold onto Mr. Rinascita. The receptionist hurried to your side, helping you carry him into the doctor's office. She told you to fill out some information at the front desk and assured you the doctor would be in momentarily. You decided it would be better if you waited for him, not wanting to intrude on his privacy. 

The receptionist allowed you to use the phone at the front desk, you never used one before. It was a strange concept, there was one in the general store, but only Mr. Rinascita and Lee used it. 

You hated the doctor's office since that fateful day in Saint Denis when Arthur passed out in the street. That was his death sentence, you saw him die that day. 

•••

_ You spotted Arthur leaning against the lamp post. The air was thick and heavy, too humid for your liking. The swamps of Lemoyne created a thick air that fell over the city, and you absolutely hated it. It was late June, which meant it was even hotter than usual.  _

_ He had been coughing more than usual. You assumed it was stress or some strange illness he had picked up while in Guarma. Disease ran rampant on ships, he could have caught it there too.  _

_ Arthur noticed you walking up to him, and you gave him a quick peck on the cheek as he continued to cough.  _

_ Your mind filled with worry when you noticed the panicked look on his face. He couldn’t stop. Your husband's chest heaved and his eyes became clouded with pain. Blood splattered from his mouth as he fell to the dirty street.  _

_ A scream erupted from your throat. The patrons of Saint Denis averted their eyes to look at you. Only one man came to help you.  _

_ He carried Arthur to the doctor’s office while you trailed behind, your hands trembling and your eyes filling with tears. The receptionist called to you once you tried to follow Arthur into the office.  _

_ “Miss, I think it’s best if you stay out here for a little while.” Her voice was sweet and soothing, but you needed to be with him.  _

_ “I- I need to be with my husband.” You stuttered through tears, attempting to wipe them away and the woman nodded with a sad smile. You entered the small office, Arthur’s blue eyes slowly opened, and they widened at the sight of you. He looked terrible, and it broke your heart.  _

_ “No, no, honey, you have to leave,” He mumbled, his chest shuddering. Tears fell freely from your eyes, and you shushed him.  _

_ “There’s no way in hell I’m leaving you.” You turned away from him, not being able to bear looking at him. You wiped the tears from your face, trying to put on a strong face for him.  _

•••

Lee rushed to the office as quickly as he could the second he received the call. You nervously bit your fingernails, a habit you had picked up while escaping Dutch and Micah. It had been awhile since you’d bitten them down, but life hadn’t been too stressful since then. 

You stood up and walked to him, handing him the rest of the paperwork you couldn’t fill out. 

He sat plopped down against the rickety chairs, moving his hands through his dark hair, sighing heavily before beginning to scribble some words onto the paper. You eyed him cautiously, taking his strong hands in your own. They were cold still, he had probably just gotten back from the pier. 

You were in his position many months ago, you knew exactly how he felt, hopeless and filled with uncertainty. 

Mr. Rinascita had complained of chest pains, and had little appetite, but being the stubborn man he was, he refused to get it checked out, claiming it was just his old age. 

After a few moments, the doctor called you back. 

_ The doctor entered after a few painstaking moments.  _

The doctor held the door open for you and Lee.

_ The doctor examined Arthur’s lungs through a stethoscope, as he sat breathless against the chair.  _

The man asked you to sit down next to the examination chair, Lee’s father sat unreadable on the leather seat. 

_ The doctor pulled out a pipe, with a frown on his face, you begged him to tell you what was wrong. Arthur coughed, more blood fell onto his sleeves.  _

The doctor waited for a moment before speaking. 

_ “He has tuberculosis.”  _

“I believe Mr. Rinascita may have cancer.” 

You gasped, covering your hand with your mouth. Lee held your hand in an iron grip as he stared at the floor. 

_ Those few words were like a stab to the chest. Quick and painful.  _

“I’m sorry.” Both doctor’s had said to you. What could they possibly be sorry for? 

  
  



	8. On A Sunny Day There Was a Railroad Car

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A train. Is it coming? Is it coming this way?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit; I’d really really love to hear some more commentary from you guys.. it’s been very quiet from you folks on ao3, I understand some of you just lurk and that’s ok! But would love to hear reactions and thoughts l!!!
> 
> Little heads up, I’m going to be very very busy within the upcoming months! Updates will no longer be daily, most likely once a week on weekends. I have been thinking about creating a little prequel that follows Arthur and Reader’s early relationships and how Reader interacted with the gang, most likely to be done during summer. 
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated! You guys on ao3 are very quiet xD 
> 
> Extra brownie points if you understand the summary and title and what it’s from ;)

Lee was distant. Even in your shared bed, it felt like sleeping next to a stranger. His kisses felt like he was imagining something else. And all you could do was watch. 

He would brush you off when you would ask if he was okay. Lee’s father was the only one who acted normal, like his diagnosis had never happened. The only thing that ever gave away that Lee’s father was sick was the occasional pain in his side that caused him to nearly double over. You were glad Mr. Rinascita was living in the now, and not like he had received his death sentence. 

Mr. Rinascita had once told you, “A person cannot get any sicker by being happy.” 

And perhaps that was true, and perhaps that was what made Arthur’s death more bearable. Arthur wasn’t happy in his last few days, and he had kept you at an arm's distance, even though he embraced everyone else. He had lived his life with you and it was time to live his life with those he had pushed out. Arthur loved you more than he had loved anything else, but to lessen the pain of his death was even more painful than his actual passing. But you had found someone who eased that pain further, a man who brought butterflies to your chest every time. You had buried Arthur, and you were hoping Lee would not have to bury his father like you had. 

Arthur was your man for so long, he was your beginning, and you had been his ending. But Lee was your ending. You loved two wildly different men, from two wildly different periods of time in your life, and for that you were grateful, to have the opportunity to love two men who loved you so dearly. 

One night though, about a week and a half after the diagnosis, Lee was rather loving, like a switch had been flicked and he had returned to his old self. You were closing up the store after a particularly slow day, and he came right to your side. 

You eyed him suspiciously, while he snuck quick glances at you, averting his eyes everytime you noticed him looking. You shyly smiled, watching as his handsome face became flustered. 

The late March setting sun fell through the windows, creating a warm glow that covered the entire store. 

“My dad wants to see us get married, before he, uh, you know..” He trailed off, setting the broom on the counter. You stared at him, stunned, feeling suddenly very strange. 

Your eyes followed his every movement, not finding words. He nervously fidgeted with his hands, regretting his bold actions. 

“I.. I was just thinking maybe..” Lee sighed, leaning against a shelf that held candy. Lee had a sweet tooth, you stopped putting butterscotch out on the counter because Lee would just eat it all. 

“Gosh, this is hard.” He laughed, glancing over to your frozen stance, but only for a moment, it was only for a second that his dark eyes fell upon you, as if he would look too long and you would crumble underneath his gaze. 

“My dad sure as hell doesn’t have all day, and there’s no use in waiting,” Lee walked over to you, painstakingly slow. He stopped mere inches from you, and you could almost hear his heart beating wildly against his chest. 

He looked nervous, more nervous than when you saw Arthur a year before in this same position. 

“I know we haven’t been together for long, but I think you’re the one I want.” Lee’s strong hands cupped your face, and you gingerly closed your eyes. 

“Would you, Mrs. Morgan, do me the honor of marrying me?” 

Joy filled your heart. Excitement, love, a thousand things. 

The ring was beautiful, a gold band with a small diamond in the center. 

“You can love me even though I was an outlaw? You can love me even though I’ve already been married?” Tears sprung to your eyes, that reflected the diamond in his hand. 

“I would still love you if you broke my heart a thousand times.” He whispered, bringing you in for a passionate kiss. It felt like home, it was intoxicating, but safe and warm. There’s no other place you’d rather be than with him. 

When he pulled away, you nodded vigorously, he slipped the hand on your right hand, as Arthur still owned your left, and Lee respected that. 

“I love you.” You told him, he wiped away your tears, leaning in for another kiss.

•••

Arthur booked the first train to Richfield, which fortunately left a few days after receiving the letter. Charles had wrote a response to John, but it would take awhile for it to get to Detroit. 

Charles knew he would be gone a max month, if he did find you. If he didn’t it would be a week. Arthur promised Charles, and Charles knew Arthur would honor that promise to the best of his ability. 

Their goodbyes were hasty, as they would be seeing each other soon. 

Soon enough, Arthur was on the train, watching Charles give him a small wave as they sped off to Richfield. 

Arthur was nervous and excited, so to ease his fiery nerves he drew in his journal. The early morning sun fell through dusty windows, creating warm rays that washed over his skin. 

He wondered how you would react to seeing him, or how you reacted to his ‘death’. Arthur knew he hadn’t been the best to you in the days leading up to the breakup of the gang. He hoped you forgave him, and understood why he acted like that. It wasn’t right, and he knew that, but he didn’t want to hurt you even more. 

It would take around a day to get to Richfield, he’d always been the one robbing trains, never thought he’d be actually on one. 

•

People came and went, before he even knew it the train had arrived in the Richfield station. He had fallen asleep a few times during the ride, and his legs ached from sitting. The dazzling city less than a mile away. It reminded him of Saint Denis, the city he had learned to despise. His heart lurched, you were somewhere inside this city, waiting for him to find you. It was early in the morning, around four. He was sure you’d be sleeping by now. 

  
•••

Lee kept you up all night.

Which meant when he finally fell asleep, you were still awake lying on the bay window, overlooking the city, listening to your fiancé’s soft snores. He slept just like Arthur, out like a light the second he fell into a bed. It was around four, the sun had not yet risen or even poked out from the horizon. Mr. Rinascita had given you both the day off to celebrate your future union. Your plans were to go to the pier again and walk the boardwalk like you had on your first date. Mr. Rinascita was ecstatic, and he nearly jumped up and down at the news, even though he was the one who told Lee to propose. 

He always looked so peaceful asleep. The sound of his calm breaths while asleep were exceptionally soothing. You could fall asleep next to him forever. 

But tonight, despite how you adored falling asleep next to him, you felt like watching the streets. 

You hadn’t seen the ghost of Arthur since you had first shared your feelings with the man you loved now, it was a wonderful sign though, that you had healed enough to no longer be haunted by him. But you feared you had begun to forget how he looked, you couldn’t quite remember how his eyes looked when the sun caught his eyes, or how his laugh was when he was tipsy. You had begun to forget, and that was terrifying. 

The locket that held your two most precious men was illuminated in the morning moon. The pearl’s iridescent color popped in the cool lighting, you remembered when Abigail had given it to you. You hoped they would send you a letter soon, but truth be told, you hadn’t checked in awhile for any letter. 

Abigail promised she would write to Charles. Sadie hadn’t written to you either, but she was probably busy with her new job. You would visit Charles soon enough, and bring Lee along. It was time he met a part of your family.  
  


•••

Arthur took a carriage to the nearest hotel. He wasn’t a fan of staying in hotels, but this week was a special occasion. The carriage driver was grumpy, tired and drove wildly. He would have walked but he didn’t know the lay of the land here and would undoubtedly get lost, so he decided not to risk it. 

It was next to the doctor’s office, post office, a bar (which he’d no doubt end up in) and a general store, when he quickly passed by, he noticed a woman looking through the window above the general store, which was odd considering the time. The hotel was cheap but clean and looked as old as dirt, as did every other storefront on this street. Apparently, it was the oldest street in Richfield, long before the city had become industrial. 

When he hit the rickety old bed, he was out like a light, and soon his soft snores filled the quiet air. The hotel was vacant, but the walls were paper thin, and they listened to the man who was desperate to find his wife. The walls wondered how he would react. 

•••

You heard the clicking of horse hooves on the cobblestone pavement, a carriage. It was odd to see a carriage out so late, but it stopped outside the hotel, so you assumed the train had arrived late. 

Toying with the locket, you unfortunately accidentally woke Lee up. His snores hitched, and you heard him sit up. You turned to face him as he rubbed his eyes. 

“Come back to bed.” He mumbled, his arm outstretched, inviting you back to the bed. You removed yourself from the spot on the window, your nightgown falling onto your bare knees. You crawled in next to him, and he fell back into the bed next to you, and he had fallen asleep faster than he had woken up. 

But this time, you welcomed sleep, and it washed over you like the waves of the river Richfield sat next to. 

•••

Lee took you to the pier at noon, the sun was high above the clouds, making the air warm and inviting. It was Sunday again, and the pier was nearly deserted. Most people still at lunch or in a late church sermon, so the pier was less crowded than any other day. 

Lee held your hand, feeling his ring on your finger. He took you to a small candy store that sold ice cream and bought you some. He bought you your favorite and he had gotten strawberry. The pink color of the ice cream complimented his eyes when he put it up to his lips, you couldn’t help but admire those precious eyes you had learned to love. 

The first place Arthur visited was the bar, knowing you would have caused some sort of mischief there at one point or another. But when he gave the bartender your name, he was just as clueless as Arthur was. The bartender had seen you walking the streets a few times, but you had never came into the bar itself. 

Next was the post office, since they weren’t legally allowed to tell him if you had any mail, all the postmaster had said was that you had been here a few times, but they hadn’t seen you for about two weeks. Arthur felt relieved knowing you were still likely in the city. 

You walked to the end of the pier with Lee, remembering your first date with him. It was so strange, not even a year later and you were already engaged to a wonderful man. 

“I love you.” He told you, his hand grasping your own. 

“I love you too.” You smiled, looking out towards the dazzling waters. 

•••

A week had come and gone, and Arthur’s train would leave within a few hours, it was his last chance. You had definitely been here, recently too, he just needed to find you first. He was desperate to find you, he  _ needed  _ to. 

The woman at the front desk had become friends with Arthur, and she had become disappointed every time he walked through that door without you. She had kept a close watch on the street while Arthur was away, keeping an eye out for a woman that fit your description. 

He’d have to buy some supplies for his journey back home, as the food in his hotel room had slowly disappeared. Arthur decided to go to the general store, a place he hadn’t yet checked. He assumed you would have lived some place near the water, and not need to go so far to get groceries since there was a new general store right by the pier. 

It was cloudy and raining. It was almost as if it were April, where the rain never stopped to help grow the May flowers. 

He hastily ran to the general store, as a crack of thunder shattered from behind him. The rain fell off of him, and he wished he still had his hat. You always said that hat was your favorite. 

Arthur pushed open the door, a small bell signaling his arrival. 

“Welcome in sir, how may I-” You faced him. 

“Arthur?” Behind the ghost, the sun peeked through the clouds. 


	9. A Gilded Cage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reunions are always interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating! Been busy! As always, I’d love to hear some more feedback from you guys! Comments truly make my day.
> 
> Edit: a poll is up on my tumblr to decide how many endings there will be on this story! https://darlingsdevil.tumblr.com/post/190575044291/hey-if-youve-read-tbor-i-have-made-a-poll-as-im
> 
> Here’s the link to the tumblr post I made!!!

You had seen a ghost. You almost thought nothing of it, but it had been months since you had seen the flashes of Arthur. This was different though, and the ghost had surely never looked this way before. 

Arthur looked different. His hair was shorter, his eyes were filled with an emotion you hadn’t seen on him in a long time. He had new wrinkles, a few around his eyes. Arthur’s laugh were few, even when he was with you he was reserved, but you could still tell when he was happy, and right now he looked ecstatic. 

Perhaps you were seeing things again, and he was just a figment of your imagination. But Arthur still stood even when you blinked.

He was there. He had returned to you. 

Sunlight fell through the windows.

He nearly choked out your name, and then a true realization hit you like a ton of bricks. You were both frozen for a moment, the two of you staring into each others eyes like it was the last thing you would ever see. 

You nearly ran into him, he held onto you so tightly as if you would slip through his fingertips. Tears fell through your eyes, your heart beating so wildly, filled with joy and disbelief, you were sure Arthur could hear it. 

He brushed your hair down.

“I’m here.” Arthur whispered to you, kissing the top of your head. 

The sun glistened through the window, shimmering over the two of you. It felt like it had been raining forever, the sun had finally returned to you. 

Lee called your name from the back room, and you quickly pulled away from Arthur, your hands suddenly shaking.

An even worse realization hit you again, this one much heavier than a load of bricks. 

Your fiancé called your name again, this time louder. When you didn’t respond he came out. Arthur’s smile fell from his lips. Lee smiled at the ‘customer’.

“Can I help you si-” Lee stopped himself, noticing your dread filled face. Anxiety and worry pooled in your stomach, you felt dizzy. 

He couldn’t know-

Lee?

Arthur? 

The weight of two worlds crashed against you, and with their falling, so did you.

•••

Your name was called, once or twice, you weren’t sure. It could have been Arthur’s or Lee’s, you didn’t know anymore. Your eyes slowly opened, Lee sat at the edge of your bed, Arthur next to him, standing, watching you intently with worried eyes.

Lee smiled when you woke, as you sat up, feeling the messy sheets surround you. 

Was that really Arthur? 

“Arthur?” You choked out. Lee’s face flashed with hurt as Arthur rushed to your side, leaving Lee nearly stunned. 

“I’m back.” He told you. You never thought you would see Arthur in the flesh again, those two words sounded like music and tears developed in your eyes just from his voice. 

You hugged him tightly, and then you noticed Lee. Watching Arthur and you with hurt eyes and you pulled away from Arthur’s hold.

“Are you alright?” Lee asked you, his voice laced with sympathy and remorse. 

“I- I don’t know how to explain this..” you whispered, covering your mouth like you’d been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to.

“I know who he is.” Lee murmured, staring out towards the windowsill. 

You glanced over to Arthur, who was examining the apartment with awe. 

“Is this all yours?” Arthur asked you, picking up a photograph of you and Lee that sat on your nightstand. 

“This is Lee,” You nodded, slowly getting out of bed to sit next to Lee. Lee shifted his head to look at you, noticing Arthur was watching you too. 

“He’s.. he’s…” you trailed off, unsure of what you should tell Arthur. He hadn’t been back from the grave more than five minutes and you had already began telling him about your fiancé. 

“I’m her fiancé.” Lee finished. Arthur’s eyes widened, but almost instantaneously that shock was replaced with duly veiled jealously. 

The air in the room became crowded with tension as the two men seemingly had a showdown with their eyes. And you were stuck in between the fighting dogs. 

“Your fiancé?” Arthur asked you, breaking his glare from Lee. He looked upset, even if he tried to hide it. 

“I- I thought you were dead, Arthur.” You mumbled, crawling over to Lee. Lee smirked at the attention, and you drew back from him, nearly disgusted. 

“Thinking maybe we should talk alone.” He grumbled, glaring at Lee. 

“Whatever you want to say, you can say it in front of the two of us.” Lee hurled back. Arthur scoffed at the proposal. 

“I won’t say shit to you. You can tell my lady is uncomfortable.” Arthur motioned towards you, sitting in between Arthur and Lee. 

“Your lady? Last time I checked, she was my fiancé.” Lee grabbed your right hand, showing off his diamond ring. 

“She’s still wearing  _ my  _ ring.” Arthur spoke with rising tension. Lee glared at him.

You felt sick again, dizzy, like everything you had built up for yourself had suddenly crashed over. Your two men were nearly fighting over you like you were some piece to be won. You weren’t the wild woman you were with Arthur, the outlaw, who never took no for an answer, who stole and killed for the thrill of it. But with Lee, you were the kind woman, who kept the shop running and went on silly romantic dates. You were torn between two versions of yourself, and you couldn’t even tell which one was true. 

Lee realized how sickly you had gotten, as did Arthur. Your hands were clammy, and your chest felt like a beating drum. 

“I need to rest for a moment.” You mumbled, the two men came to your side but you weakly pushed them away. They were confused, expecting the other to be pushed away, not both. 

“Come back to my hotel room, I’ll take care of you.” Arthur attempted to coax you. 

“This is  _ our  _ apartment. She lives here. Look, I know you’re back from the dead or whatever bullshit that is, but you have to back off, we’re getting married in two weeks.” Lee spat at him. 

“I’ve known her for 15 damn years! You’ve known her for what, a year? Maybe less! She’s still my wife whether you like it or not.” Arthur yelled back. 

You couldn’t take it. 

“Shut up! The both of you!” You yelled, tears falling over your cheeks. 

“You’ve made her cry.” You weren’t sure who mumbled that insult, and honestly, you didn’t care.

“Get out, both of you! Get out! Get out, get out, get out!” You screamed with an ear splitting shriek. You were not some goddamn prize to be won, you were not either of theirs, you were your own damn person. 

You were blinded by frustration and rage, overwhelmed by sorrow and disbelief. The two men sheepishly left, and the minutes ticked on. You had to get out of this cage. This room was a locked prison. It was stuffy and the memories suffocated you. 

You had to get out. 

The windowsill was a short drop, you’d jumped out of windows much higher in heists, or simply because you felt like it in your wild teen years. You hadn’t realized it had already gotten dark. It was around noon when you first saw Arthur, so you presumed it was at least eight in the evening. Arthur and Lee must have become accompanied with each other while you were out, only adding to their boiling feud.

Arthur and Lee would most likely be in the shop, which meant you had to be swift in your escape, if they caught you now you would never be free. You opened the bay window, the cool breeze drifted onto you, making you feel more alive than you ever had before. 

You sat on the bay window, overlooking the dark streets. Few people were out, and the streets lamps cast dark shadows on the cobblestone. 

One, two, three.

You fell gracefully with a thud, and burst down the street. far away from your cage. It was exhilarating. The air was fresh and cool. It felt absolutely wonderful.

Arthur and Lee would notice you missing soon enough and while Arthur would be out searching for you, Lee would have already dispatched every police officer in Richfield to find you. You would return to them, eventually. But right now all you needed was to be free, without having to worry about the mess going on at your home. 

You didn’t want to be found just yet. They’d have to wait. 

Soon enough, the cobblestone turned into gravel, and it crunched under your swift limbs. After the gravel was the dirt. You hadn’t traveled much around Richfield, and you suddenly realized how much you missed the adrenaline rush of risk. Before you even noticed, you were a mile out from the farthest home in Richfield. The sky was bright now, it reminded you of the night Arthur proposed to you, and that sudden surprise of joy flooded you, like you could scream, maybe even jump up and down, and you did just that. You were a bird who’d finally been allowed to fly. 

Just how long had you been caged? 


	10. And Miles to Go Before I Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bird in flight. Where will it go?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: blood and violence   
> I changed the title.. since I decided I liked this one better.   
> I love torturing you guys >:3c.. poll is still open for the ending! https://darlingsdevil.tumblr.com/post/190575044291/hey-if-youve-read-tbor-i-have-made-a-poll-as-im
> 
> Here’s a link to the tumblr post I made regarding it!

* * *

It had been two days, two days after you had ran away from Lee’s home. You set up a small camp about four miles from the city, the wildlife was abundant so you had little trouble finding food. It took some getting used to the gamey meat and the tortuous action of hunting, it had been awhile since you had the need to hunt after all. The nights were mild, as summer was quickly approaching again. Just over a year ago you lived a completely different life, with completely different people, but now the main person in your old life had returned, disrupting the one you were currently building. 

You tried not to think of Arthur or Lee, the wedding was 12 days away, and you were sure you would be back before then, but Lee would be furious with you. He had changed when Arthur arrived, it scared you to no end. He was vicious and jealous, nothing like the sweet and goofy Lee you knew. 

Arthur was different too, but in a good way. He wasn’t overcome with illness and stress and you could see it in the short time you were with him. He held himself to a higher standard. There was so much to catch up on. 

The woods were freeing and left you with lots of time to think. Perhaps you should have gone out farther, but truth be told, a part of you wanted to be caught. The woods were no place for a newly turned city girl, but your roots lie in the trees, as they always would.

You went fishing in a small creek with a makeshift spear. Survival activities were the only thing keeping you from boredom, no wonder you always went on odd jobs with Arthur while living in camp. There was nothing to do. Atleast your job with Lee kept you busy, it was fun work too.

The sun was high in the sky, it’s warmth radiated onto you and made the clear waters glisten in the rays. It was peaceful.. the perfect remedy for a jumbled mind. After missing a particularly large fish you threw your spear down with a thud. You sighed heavily, looking out towards the city.The creek was on higher ground, which overlooked the fields between you and Richfield, and then you noticed something in the distance. 

Around fifteen men, clad in blue trotting along to your hideaway. They had bloodhounds too, expert tracker dogs, you would have to be smart to hide your scent. They looked to be about two miles out. The police were searching for you now, you had to be quick to hide. You knew Lee would send an army to find you, you were surprised Arthur hadn’t found you yet. 

You cursed under your breath, you picked up your spear and knife that you kept hidden underneath your skirt, you quickly doused yourself in the water in hopes to lose a bit of your scent. You rushed to your temporary home, feeling the cold bite of your dampened clothes. You kicked dirt over the unlit bonfire, attempting to hide the charred timbers. Luckily, your camp was hidden behind a thicket of trees and was hard to spot and far off the main road. But there were tracks from the mud made during the storm, and hopefully they wouldn’t give you away just yet. 

There was nowhere to hide that you new of, your best bet would be to cross the river you knew of that many travelers used to get into Richfield as it led to the pier. But the river was at least another two miles, you were unsure if you could outrun fifteen men on horseback. These men were police however, not manhunters, they wouldn’t find you as easily as a bounty hunter would. If it resorted to that, Lee would put a bounty on your head if they couldn’t find you, eventually. You wouldn’t drag it on that long, just enough to clear your head completely. Or perhaps it was just stubbornness. 

You packed what little belongings you had in the satchel you had taken with you, and began sprinting towards, what you hoped, was the river. Pure adrenaline rushed through your veins as you understood the gravity of the situation. 

It felt like forever as you ran, effortlessly avoiding the main trail, the brush of trees made it somewhat difficult to follow but you still managed. The further you went into the forest, the darker it got. It was silently eerie, the only sound was the crunching of the forest floor underneath your feet.

Suddenly you came to a formation of rocks as the land delved upwards again. There was a small opening, hidden by a tree. A cave! You had no time to fret, it was the perfect hiding spot, even though the river was your best shot, you couldn’t outrun that many men, especially as your breath had ran out half a mile ago. 

Upon further inspection, you realized that the small ‘opening’ was actually rather large but was well hidden. You snuck in, quietly, hoping to wait out the men and the dogs. You were still soaked, just ran a mile and a half, ran through the forest while tripping over fallen logs and roots and now you were in a smelly cave. Perhaps you should have just stayed home. 

You walked about twenty feet into the cave, it was much longer than you would have expected and seemed to go further down, possibly leading to an underground cave system. It stunk of festering flesh, like something had died here recently, you decided not to venture further. There was a large boulder to hide behind, you could still see the entrance clearly. 

•••

It was around an hour before you heard the far off howling of the hounds and shouts from the men. You held your breath, waiting for them to pass you, you clutched your knife tightly, in case any of the men, if they did find you, had any funny ideas. 

Your name was shouted multiple times followed by “where are you?”. You were silent, frozen, and watching the entrance with attentive eyes.

Ten minutes later, and they were near right outside the cave. You mentally cursed yourself, those dogs would find you. The men wouldn’t venture into the cave but the dogs sure would. 

You heard the police officers shouting to one another, stating that the trail had ended around here. 

A dog walked past your hidden cave, and you froze. It’s muzzle sniffed along the ground, it’s ears flopping against the dirt. 

It had gotten darker out, the sun nearly setting. They would be stupid to not turn back for the night if they didn’t find you, but the odds were greatly against you, you were sure you would be found. 

The howling of wolves saved you. 

The men began cursing, pulling out their rifles. The dog outside your cave became spooked, barking rapidly, it’s tail in a defensive stance. The horses whinnied, and soon enough you heard them galloping away, terrified. Gunshots pierced the air, making you jump in your place. 

A wolf whimpered, another shot dead from what you heard. Then another, and one more. The men began retreating as the remaining wolf did too. The police officers would have to find the bloodhounds, horses and you now. 

But then it dawned on you.

The festering smell, a large cave, a pack of wolves. 

You were in a wolf den. 

The wolf retreated into the cave, it stuck its nose up and sniffed the air. 

You clutched your knife so tightly that your knuckles were white. You had fought off wolves before, with guns, never with a knife. It was only one wolf, you had somewhat decent chances, but you were rusty from a year of no practice. 

The wolf bared its teeth after smelling you in the cave. It began running towards your boulder, you jumped out from the rock as it barreled towards you, the silver glint of the knife mirroring the vicious teeth of the wolf. It was a large gray wolf, possibly the alpha. 

The wolf tackled you to the ground, it’s heavy paws pining you to the floor, it tried to take a bite out of your neck with its strong jaw, but you held back its face with your arm. 

It growled against you, you stabbed it in the side as you struggled to get out of from its grip. Its paws dug into your chest, making you grunt in pain. 

The wolf snapped at your neck, it was too strong for you, you had to act quickly. You stabbed the wolf again, this time deeper into its side. It whimpered in pain but still fought you. The knife became slippery with blood, and it felt from your hand. 

You immediately reached for the knife that clattered to the rocky ground. The wolf took its chance and bit you in the arm, you screamed in pain as you fought it off. 

You used your last remaining bit of strength to kick it in its side, where you had stabbed it twice. It only faltered for a moment, and was instantly on you in another.

The knife was just barely out of reach, your fingertips nearly touching the blade. The dog shifted, and you were able to grasp the knife. 

You stabbed it blindly. Again and again. 

The wolf fell off you with a thud. Its whimpers slowly died out.

Blood pooled from your chest in arm, where it tore flesh. 

_ That was a lot of blood. _

Your mind still raced with instinct, your breathing had not yet slowed down.

It would be so easy to just stay here…

Maybe someone would find you.

_ No _ . If you stopped to rest you would die from blood loss. You had seen it take other people before, it would not take you. 

You ripped a piece of your skirt to make a tourniquet. It could only be applied to your arm, there were too many holes in your chest to stop it all. You tied the fabric tightly around your arm, it hurt awfully.

Your picked up your knife, slowly making your way to the entrance of the cave. It was much darker now. 

The air was colder than it had been during the day. You shivered against the cold. The main trail was east, or perhaps west of the cave. 

Your feet became tired as blood continued to pour out of you..

After a few minutes your body threatened to give out.. you could see the trail now despite your blurred vision. It was closer now. 

Black clouded the corners of your vision, you were only a few feet away. 

You stumbled over something, and you fell to the ground. It would be so easy to just lie here.

You used your good arm to crawl towards the road. It hurt terribly. Your good arm became bloodied too as the forest floor cut into your skin. 

The road was right there. 

You had made it.

You let your body sprawl across the dirt trail. 

The sky was a brilliant shade of blue. Stars sewed into the dark sky. 

Your eyes slowly fell as the blood continued to pool around your battered body.

The unknown spread across your body. 

You were allowed to rest now. 

  
  
  



	11. The Resurrection of The Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The search begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I’m still alive lol. I’ve had a lot going on, and when I usually write (on Saturday’s) have now been taken up by five hour rehearsals (rip me). An extra long chapter for you guys. I did a lot of editing, as I wasn’t originally happy with how this chapter played out.
> 
> Also, we’re close to the end. Lee’s ending and Arthur’s ending (canon ending) will be two chapters each! After the original fifteen, there will be four more. The split will be at chapter 15, unless it ends up being longer (which it probably will). I’ll be writing some oneshots and AU’s + playlists for the finale. Still playing around with a few final ideas.. think I have it all set up (mostly..). I will say however, both endings will end relatively happy. Relatively. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! 
> 
> Also, if you understand the title, you are super cool B)

“What the hell do you mean she’s gone?” Lee yelled. 

“What does it sound like? She’s not in the room anymore.” Arthur quipped back, becoming increasingly annoyed. 

Lee ran to the stockroom, you weren’t there. Then to his father's room, you weren’t there either. Mr. Rinascita was sleeping. Lee hoped he wouldn’t be woken. 

Panic rose in Lee, it felt suffocating. He pushed the door open, shouting your name into the street, looking both ways and searching for your face upon the scatters of people. No response. Arthur came down the steps, holding his gun in hand, the air around him was heavy and electric. 

“Where’d you take her?” Arthur growled at Lee. Lee turned around in the street, glaring at him. 

“You think I know?” Lee laughed, his voice dripping with venom. The cool air fell over him, but he was nothing but calm. 

Arthur pulled him into the general store by the collar of his shirt, Lee stumbled but didn’t fall, choking and sputtering on air. 

“You think I’m scared of you, outlaw?” Lee spat at him, catching his breath. 

“You should be, boy.” Arthur told him. 

“I’m surprised she married a man like you.” 

“You don’t know the first thing about her then.” Arthur scoffed. 

It was like a standoff. The two men glaring at each other with pure rage. 

“She's never done anything like this before. The second you show up, she goes missing.” Lee excused Arthur. 

“You really think I’d abduct my own wife?” 

“I’m sure you’ve done a hell of a lot worse than that.” 

“You’re right. I have. That means I won’t have any qualms about putting a bullet right between your eyes either. But lucky for you, I care about my wife, so I won’t do that.” Arthur told him, slowly lowering his gun. 

Lee remained silent, narrowing his eyes at Arthur. 

“We have to find her.” Lee told Arthur. Arthur nodded, setting aside his hatred for Lee for a moment's notice. 

“We’ll make a report for her at the station. The police officers will know what to do.” Lee suggested. 

“No, police won’t do anything. I’ll find her myself.” Arthur grumbled already walking out the door. 

“You’ll get lost out there!” Lee shouted. He didn’t care if Arthur got hurt out there, but he knew you cared for him deeply, why however, he wasn’t sure. 

“I’ve tracked her down before. She never goes far.” Arthur chuckled bitterly, standing in the street. 

Lee was silent for a moment. 

“I’m coming with you.” Lee told him with confidence. 

Arthur turned to Lee, raising a brow.

“Boy, you don’t know what’s out there. I’m sure she’s gotten herself into some sort of trouble already. Do you even know how to handle a gun?” Arthur asked him. Lee was angry, Arthur was talking down to him like a dog. 

“No, but I’m sure I could learn. Besides with you, tough mountain man, I’m sure I wouldn’t need it.” 

Arthur scoffed, but held open the door for him. 

“Wait, I.. I have to check on my dad.” Lee said, worry filling him. Arthur was halfway out the door, ready to leave Lee behind. 

“Wait! Please!” 

Arthur swiveled around, waiting for Lee to move.

“The longer the wait the further she’s gone.” 

“Please.” Lee begged him. Arthur understood, a long time ago he would have done the same for a certain father figure. 

“Alright. Go on. Quickly.” Arthur sighed, leaning against the door frame.

Lee nodded, rushing up the stairs. 

He was gone a few moments, and they were out the door and down the street in another.

Arthur was sure you headed for the hills, as you couldn’t go anywhere else since the river blocked that entry off. He hadn’t seen much of the terrain up there, only seeing it from a distance. 

“We’ll head for the hills, she probably isn’t anywhere in the city.” Arthur told Lee, Lee kept a watchful eye, making sure none of the few strangers on the street were you. You could easily be hidden within the crowds of strangers during the day, but it was night and few people were out. 

“How do you know she’s not in the city?” Lee questioned him as they continued their search. 

“Everytime she goes missing she never stays in the city. She’s gone missing a few times before, usually when things start getting rough and she needs time to cool down.” 

Lee was dumbfounded, he couldn’t imagine you thinking so rashly. But then again, you were very different before he knew you. Living with a gang, being a wanted outlaw, even marrying one. It still felt surreal to him. 

Arthur remembered you went missing the day he earned his death sentence at the doctors office, he pushed you away and you ran. You were gone for two days, and when you came back you were even more upset towards yourself that you had left him when he needed you so badly, unfortunately he couldn’t look for you, there was too much going on and no one else seemed to notice you were missing either. It rained that day, like the sky was weeping for the both of you. 

The men walked in silence, their heels clicking against the cobblestone streets. 

“Did you miss her?” Lee asked him as they continued their search. 

Arthur was silent for a moment. 

“Of course I did. Everyday, everyday I woke up and my heart ached because I had no idea where she was, or if she was even alive. I missed her every damn day, and now I’ve returned to her.” Arthur’s voice was heavy with emotion. Lee could see the longing in his eyes, shamed burned in him, hidden by his wall of pride he had put up. Lee acted foolishly, automatically assuming Arthur fit the stereotype of the rugged outlaw, and perhaps he did and he had already seen that side of Arthur, but he had just seen the kind, emotional side of him. If you hadn’t fit the conventional outlaw style and he had given you a chance, why shouldn’t he give Arthur a chance? 

And then Lee remembered. Arthur was the one thing standing in Lee’s way.

“I can tell she still loves you.” 

“And she loves you too. Awful situation, ain’t it?” The two men laughed. 

“I guess so.” Lee mumbled through his chuckles. He examined the faces of every person he had seen on the deserted streets, glanced down every alleyway and you were nowhere to be found. Arthur knew you wouldn’t have hidden in plain sight, you weren’t like that. 

“How’d you even meet her?” Arthur asked him. They had reached the outskirts of the city, the houses were bigger and newer, large sprawling farm houses with new projects being added damn near everyday. The forest was about a mile out, with various hills that shot upwards making the land look like an ancient land giant, slumbering away for the rest of eternity. Perhaps if the men listened hard enough, they could hear the soft snores of an urban legend. 

“She came with a family. A man, a woman and a boy. The man had scars, I remember. They looked like they had been running for days, and I bet they were, from what she has told me about all that,” Lee told him. Arthur nodded in response. 

“They stopped in the store, she asked if we had any openings, we didn’t really need another set of hands but my father insisted on hiring her. The rest is history.” Lee finished.

Arthur was silent, taking in his words. 

“How’d you meet her in that gang?” Lee asked him after a moment. Arthur looked surprised that Lee had known of his past, but recovered quickly. 

“Well.. I’d been in the gang for about 10 or so years when she came along. I saved her from a gang, they kidnapped her.” Lee stared in awe at Arthur, he had such a vibrant story, one worthy of the novels his father reads. Lee was a simple shop clerk, having never left the city and would probably never have to leave. This was the most exciting thing that had possibly ever happened to him but to Arthur, it was simply another day. 

“She only trusted me at first, stuck by my side like a stray dog, but I was foolish and was still in love with a woman who couldn’t love me back so we wasted a few of the years we could’ve been together. Boy, was that girl wild. She could pull a gun on you faster than you could blink. One thing led to another, we got married, and then it all went to hell.” Arthur finished. 

Perhaps it was foolish to walk through the outskirts of Richfield, at night no less. Both men hadn’t quite thought it through, blind by their love for you. Arthur was keeping a watchful eye on the ground, the rain had created mud but there were wagon and horse tracks covering a majority of the muddy dirt road. 

“Should we shout her name?” Lee asked after a moment. 

“No, I’m sure she’s in the woods. If we shouted her name she’d no doubt hide.” 

“I still think we should enlist the police. What if she didn’t escape, what if someone kidnapped her?” 

“I’m a wanted outlaw, and she’s still wanted too, I’m sure of it. Members of the Van der Linde gang are still at large after the mess we made down south. She’s too smart to get kidnapped.”

Lee’s eyebrows furrowed in deep thought. He was beyond worried. With the new arrival of your recently revived husband, and the wedding two weeks away, you could easily get cold feet and leave him, and to top if all off you could have been kidnapped, or ran away and never come back like his sister had. He felt his emotions bubbling inside him, how long would it be till he cracked? 

“My sister ran off and never came back.” Lee told Arthur solemnly, the twigs crunching underneath their shoes. 

“I’m sorry that happened to your sister, but I don’t think this will happen to my wife.” 

“You better be right, Mr. Morgan.” Lee was annoyed at Arthur’s nonchalant response, you could have been seriously injured and he had barely any worry, like it was simply another day. It angered Lee. 

They walked for a few more minutes, there were barely any tracks made by human footprints in the road and the night had begun to become disheartening for both of them. Your lack of presence took a toll on both men, more so on Lee. 

Wolves howled in the distance, far off, Lee froze. 

“We should turn back.” Lee spoke frantically. 

Arthur turned around, looked back towards the road and then to Lee again and nodded. 

“Maybe those wolves found John Marston instead.” Arthur mumbled, humor in his voice.

“Who’s John Marston?” Lee asked as they made their way back to the general store. It was a long walk home, the two men dreading it already. 

“A close friend. Well, he’s not a friend. More like a brother to (Y/N) and I. Well anyways, he got attacked by wolves while we were in the mountains, more south then we are now, near Valentine - if you know where that is. Was a few months before everything went to hell. Never let him live it down for a moment.” 

“I’ve never heard of it.” Lee responded. The city was somewhat closer now, the street lamps looked like fireflies in the distance. 

“I live close to that city now, with a friend, he built the cottage for us when I was still sick.” Arthur continued. 

“You were sick?” Lee looked at him. 

“Yeah, really sick for awhile. Did some bad things before I had realized how sick I was, and I guess it was an eye opener of sorts. Did some bad things to my wife too when I was sick, but it’s in the past now, I’m just glad I found her again.” Arthur told him slowly. Lee saw it then, why you had fallen for him, and why with Arthur still around you would never truly be his. You and Arthur had something Lee didn’t, and that was history. But Lee’s love for you was real, and that’s all that mattered. Lee would stand his ground and fight for your love. He just hoped you would make the right choice in the end. 

•••

Mr. Rinascita was furious with Lee. Lee finally confessed to your absence during dinner on the first day in. Lee hadn’t mentioned Arthur yet, there was enough on his father's plate already. Lee had never seen his father so angry, usually the calm, but cheerful man.

“You lost your fiancé?” Mr. Rinascita said glaring daggers into Lee’s eye’s. Lee tried to explain things as calmly as he could, while avoiding the major details of Arthur’s arrival, simply stating an old friend had resurfaced and it overwhelmed you. 

Lee nodded slowly. 

“Well then what the hell are you doing waiting here? Go find the police, get them to find her. I won’t have what happened to your sister happen to her! _Partire!_ ” Mr. Rinascita yelled, shooing him away. Lee scurried to the door and pulled on his coat. 

Next, Lee nearly ran to Arthur’s hotel, which was literally just down the street from the general store, and quickly told him what was going on. Arthur understood, but still opposed the idea. Arthur was sure to tell Lee to leave your real name out of it and only tell them your first name and Lee’s own last name, Rinascita. 

After that was the police station. It was bustling with people, officers making reports at their desks and the jail cells holding multiple criminals. The woman at the front desk smiled at him sweetly. 

“I’d like to make a missing persons report.” He told her, resting his hands on the wooden counter. 

She nodded and pulled something out of a cabinet, handing him a paper and a pen. The woman told him to fill it out and once he was done and an officer would speak with him. 

The paper held basic information, your name, age, height, last known location and place of residence. He wrote it all down and turned it back to the front desk. She led him to a desk that was incredibly clean and orderly and asked him to sit down. 

The chair was rickety. The police station smelled of old wood with a mixture of gunpowder, it did not calm Lee’s nerves. He had never been inside a police station, or even talked to a police officer. This entire process was new to him. Lee secretly wished Arthur was here, Arthur would have been able to give the officers more information than he could have. 

Lee’s foot tapped against the wooden floor rapidly, officers walked by him, paying him no mind. The desk he sat at was incredibly orderly and larger than a majority of the others. He felt out of place, ordinary, when probably everyone in the room had a much greater story than he had. 

A police officer sat down, catching him off guard. Lee shifted uncomfortably. 

“Hello, Mr. Rinascita,” The police officer said, setting down his paper file. 

Lee responded with a small greeting. The police officer was young, possibly in his late twenties, like Lee. But his eyes were tired and cold, with a steely gaze that made you feel as though everything you said was the wrong answer. 

“How long has your wife been missing?” 

•••

The next day, a group of officers went to look for you. They started their search at eight in the morning and came back empty handed at nine at night. Lee’s anxiety grew as the search continued, the police officers didn't allow him to come. Sitting, waiting for you to return home to him was one of the worst pains he ever experienced. His father barely talked to him, his fury needing no words. Arthur hadn’t been to the general store, simply assuming Arthur had been searching for you as well. Lee felt useless, sitting in the store, watching the windows for your safe arrival home. It was truly dreadful. He hated every second of it. 

Lee filled the void in his heart with working non stop, sweeping the floors every two hours, making sure the shelves were stocked and kept orderly. It was the only thing keeping him sane. 

When nine rolled around, the police officer head of your case, came into the store. The same man with the judgemental gaze. He had learned to loathe that man already, speaking to the officer brought him no comfort. 

The cop, Officer Clark seemed to be the bearer of bad news. Clark was discerning to say the least, pessimistic. 

“We did find evidence of her at a small camp, a few miles outside of the city. The hounds were able to follow a trail, but wolves scared them off. We were close too, some of the men believe she could have been in the trees where we turned back. We’ll start the first thing in the morning again.” Officer Clark said cooly. Lee let out a sigh he hadn’t realized he’d been holding, he leaned on the counter. 

“Thank you, Officer Clark. Truly.” 

“You’re welcome. We will find your wife.” 

The word wife seemed so natural. Like it was meant for Lee and you alone. 

Officer Clark smiled and left. The first genuine emotion Lee had seen on Officer Clark since their first interaction. He left quickly after that. 

Lee was closer to you. Closer then it seemed he had ever been, yet you were separated from him by miles of land. He learned things about you, new things. Despite the shocking information he learned, he loved you even more. Your absence made him realize how much he truly loved you, you were his second half. 

Lee would wait for you to return to him, no matter how long it took. 


	12. To Your Thoughts I’ll Soon Be Listening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The return of a certain someone brings out a a reaction in Lee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: I made a discord server! Feel free to talk (or lurk). I know tbor is a smaller story but I’d love to talk to you guys <3
> 
> https://discord.gg/GQUzFDH
> 
> Warnings: pretty angsty stuff, minor gore
> 
> Ps. I’m not a doctor, and only did minimal research on early 1900’s medicinal practices. 
> 
> This is a Lee focused chapter, the next will be Arthur! 
> 
> Oh man I cried while writing this, the first time that’s ever happened! 
> 
> And also there’s a lot of foreshadowing that I was able to tie into this chapter. As some of you may know, I don’t plot shit so what I usually just start writing and let it lead wherever and say ok this is good and publish it lmao. A lot of earlier stuff wasn’t meant to be foreshadowing but I was able to weave it into this chapter!

The first thing you thought of was candy. Peppermints, licorice, chocolate, kettle corn, butterscotch, brittle, saltwater taffy, gumdrops and wafers. The ice cream parlor on the pier, the fudge store with the owner who always remembered your name no matter how many years had passed since your last visit. What you thought was death, in reality quite sweet. The bliss of unknowing, weightlessness was comforting. Fog had been veiled over your eyes, you could nearly taste the candy now.

Just a bit closer, like floating on a cloud. It was welcoming, intoxicating, a stark contrast to the heartbreak of the mortal world. 

But only candy was on your mind as you lay in the back of a wagon, blood covering your clothes, hay poking your sides, straw in your wild hair. Scratches littering your arms and a continuous stream of blood falling over your skin from the large puncture wound in your chest. 

Candy. 

The sugary taste that children screamed and cheered for, that brought smiles to the faces of the consumers. Candy. Only candy. 

It could have been minutes or hours, but the sugary treat was only on your mind. You were knocking on death's door, but it seemed the Reaper wasn’t home. You were waiting for that final push into either side, living or death, waiting to be out of limbo. 

The owner of the wagon you lay in had found you on the dirt road, right on the main path, in a pool of your own blood, barely breathing. He wondered who you were and what your story was. 

So now you lay, unconscious, covered in hay, bloodied and battered, thinking of candy. What a strange thing, you thought.

•••

Lee received the news first from Officer Clark. It was around three in the morning when he woke to the rapid sound of knocking at the general store door. He could barely hear it, but he was up sick with worry and couldn’t sleep. 

Lee opened up the door to a tired Officer Clark. Dread filled him, Clark looked worried. 

“A woman was found in the woods. She fits your wife’s profile. She’s heavily wounded, she’s in the hospital now, outside of town. Please come with me, Mr. Rinascita, she’s in a very critical state.” Officer Clark told him urgently. Lee was snapped out of his groggy state and pulled on his coat that hung next to the door. 

Lee was unsure of what to say, so he followed Officer Clark to his horse. It was cold out, colder than it had been recently, the streets were deserted, barely a light on. Lee was even more worried than he had been. Lee was terrified, you could have severe damage, robbed, raped, terrible things could have been done to you while you were gone. Lee was beyond scared, but he couldn’t wait to see you. 

Arthur would have to wait, it was selfish of Lee to not tell Arthur but they had to act quickly and Lee had no time to seek out Arthur. Your life was on the line, he would never risk it. 

Officer Clark helped Lee onto the back of his horse, they darted through the empty streets towards the hospital. Lee felt sick, emotions bubbling inside him didn’t help with the quick motions of the horse. 

It felt like an eternity. The ride to the hospital was long as it was in the outskirts of the growing city. It didn’t help with his nerves. You had so much placed onto your chest, but you shouldn’t have acted so rashly, there would be time for that talk later, he was already dreading it. 

When they finally arrived at the hospital, Lee hopped off the horse and ran in. Officer Clark was close behind him. 

“I- I.. someone came in earlier, a woman. I’m her husband,” Lee told the man at the desk. Lee looked wild, disheveled hair, more so than it always was, wrinkled clothes after he couldn’t bring himself to change clothes for bed. There was a frantic look in his eyes. 

The man looked at him with sympathetic eyes.

“I need you to fill out some forms for me before you can see her and proof of your relation to her.” The man said slowly, as if Lee would crack at any moment. 

Lee shook his head with disbelief.

“I-I no, I can’t, there’s no time. My wife is in there and she’s dying, please sir, I have to see her.” Lee begged the man. 

Officer Clark entered, the man instantly looked towards him. 

“He’s with me, Flynn. You can let him through.” Officer Clark said from behind Lee. Lee sighed in relief. 

Flynn nodded and pointed towards a door. 

“She’s in there.” 

Lee walked quickly through it. It was a large room with many beds. Some were encased in a curtain, others out in the open. He walked through the aisles of sick and wounded people. He felt his stomach twist at the sight of every person. Every step felt like he was walking towards hell. 

Children looked at him with sunken eyes. Men and women coughing out their lungs, envying him for being healthy. Lee could barely take it. He wondered how you and Arthur would feel when you looked around the room, you had told him how badly the two of you reacted to Arthur’s diagnosis. It would be reliving it all again. 

“She’s here, Mr. Rinascita.” Officer Clark told him. Lee had walked past your bed, so caught up with all the eyes watching him and the emotions he felt, he had missed your bed. 

Lee turned around. His heart nearly shattered. 

Your face was scratched, bandages littering your body. 

“Is that your wife, sir?” 

Lee’s ears were filled with cotton, he zoned in on your barely breathing body. It shook him to his core.

“Yes,” Lee said, choking back tears. He looked at the officer.

“That’s her.” 

Officer Clark nodded.

“I’ll leave you two alone then. Please come by to the station to fill out the rest of the report when you’re ready.” 

Lee was struggling to hold back his emotions, they were like a tsunami, a ferocious wave coming up abruptly and ripping down everything he had built up. 

He plopped down in the chair next to your bed, rubbing his hands through his messy brown hair. It was his father’s diagnosis all over again. Sitting, waiting for the inevitable to reach him, fate tying it’s cold hands tightly around him.

Lee’s father would have less than a year, the doctor assumed. Only Lee had learned of this, Mr. Rinascita chose not to, rather than living everyday wasting away waiting for it to come, he would be fine with not knowing, because that’s how death was supposed to work, it would come suddenly, leaving all those affected reeling. 

And now he wondered, if he would lose you too. What if he was witnessing your last breath? What if you died while he sat there, helpless. 

He leaned forward, holding your hand gently in his. Lee brushed his thumb over your cold hands. They were too cold, but just warm enough to show him you were still alive. Lee kept telling himself he shouldn’t cry in a place that experienced so much suffering, but tears kept threatening to spill out of the corner of his eyes. 

“Why would you leave me like that?” Lee mumbled, his voice cracking. Tears fell from his eyes like a flash flood. You had made an impulsive decision, one that left him sick with worry and now you were almost dead. Lee felt selfish for being angry, like he wasn’t supposed to, but he had every right to be. Perhaps it was his fault, he judged Arthur quickly and seemed like he had paid the price for it. 

He thought your arrival back to him would bring him peace, it only created more turmoil in him, a brewing mess that would rain down soon enough. 

Lee was a storm and he would let all that rain fall down soon.

•••

Minutes turned into hours while he held your hand, waiting for you to wake up. When the next shift of nurses came in, a younger nurse found him nearly instantly. She gave him your medical file after proving his relation to you. 

“This is for you, sir. It’s your wife’s medical file, explaining everything the doctor had seen. He still needs to run more tests when she wakes up.” The nurse said sweetly to him, he opened up the file and read the doctor’s note.

_ Seems to have been attacked by a large animal, most likely a wolf. Blisters found on patients foot as well as bruising, possibly ran many miles to safety. Large wounds on upper right chest and left forearm as well as various punctures around the chest area. A tourniquet made out of fabric was placed on the forearm. Possible brain commotion. Patient is currently stabilized as of 3/18/00, 2h34.  _

_ Further testing is required. Patient may wake up any time now to 8h000.  _

Lee handed the file back to the nurse, a thousand thoughts racing through his mind but not a single word he could find.

“If she hadn’t placed the tourniquet on her arm, she would have likely died from blood loss. She made it just in enough time. You have a smart wife.” The nurse told him, attempting to comfort him. 

Lee struggled to show a reaction. 

The nurse continued to smile at him. 

“Would you like something to eat?” 

“No, I’m fine.” He said quickly, staring at your unconscious body. 

“Alright, well, the doctor will be here to check up on her. In the meantime, is there anyone you would like to call to inform? We have a phone at the front desk.” 

Lee nodded. 

“It’s just through those doors.” The nurse said before waking to her many other patients. Lee got up, once again feeling the eyes of the sick on him. 

As he pushed open the doors, it was like a breath of fresh air. But he had left you behind those doors, and instantly thought of turning around. There were other people who needed you, it wouldn’t be right to hog you all to himself as much as he wanted to. 

Lee asked for the phone, when he got it he mindlessly found the number for the hotel Arthur was staying at. A woman answered and told him to call another number so he did. 

It picked up on the second ring. 

“Hello?” Arthur’s groggy voice spoke through the phone. 

“It’s me, Lee. She’s here, at the hospital. Someone found her. I don’t know all the details yet but she’s really hurt. Please come soon.” 

Arthur took in Lee’s words like a punch to the gut.

“I’ll be there soon. Keep her safe for me, Lee.” He said after a moment.

•••

  
  
  
  



	13. Whispers of An Early Morning Traveler

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The awaited reunion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for my hiatus,, had a tough time past few weeks.. and I really hated this chapter when I first started writing it but I like it now so. 
> 
> Here’s the discord server link; I hope you’ll join me. I don’t expect there to be too many members, but I hope you’ll have fun here :)
> 
> https://discord.gg/GQUzFDH

Lee returned to your side after hanging up the phone. Once again he was stared at, all eyes on him. He was the only visitor, after all it was six in the morning. Two more hours and you should be awake, at least from the doctor’s estimate. They assumed you had passed out from exhaustion and blood loss, judging by your clothes and your feet, but still it was an estimate. There was no telling when you woke up. 

You looked peaceful, despite being bruised and bloodied. It made his heart lurch. 

He’d have to wait. Waiting was something Lee was good at, or rather, he had learned to be good at. This week had been beyond insane, only a few days before the wedding, you hadn’t even found a dress. The plan was a very simple wedding, married at the chapel in the woods, Lee inviting his close friends from childhood, and then a small party at the apartment. The honeymoon would be a trip to Chicago, as you’d always wanted to return to your home city. Lee wanted to see a sprawling city, larger than Richfield. But a wedding seemed so fruitless now, it was very possibly there would be no wedding and Lee would be left alone again. It seemed outlaws always weaseled their way into his life, and the outcome was never good. 

What would he tell his father? His father probably already expected an old flame had returned. His father would die before he would get to see Lee married. The thought scared him, one day his father wouldn’t be here, and that day would be coming very quickly. 

Arthur was there within minutes of his call, he looked tired too. It seemed like all three of them were.

His heavy footsteps knocked Lee out of his deep thought, Lee simply nodding to him. 

Arthur looked vacant at the sight of you, sighing as he sat down next to Lee’s chair. 

“When’d they find her?” 

“Couple hours ago. I think, at least. Not too sure.” 

“This whole mess..” Arthur trailed off, still staring at you with watchful eyes. 

“I know.” Lee laughed dryly. 

Silence ticked on. Coughs rung out through the building. Arthur looked around, grimacing at the sight of gaunt and pale faces. 

“I looked like all these people a few months ago,” Arthur muttered. 

“Surprised she was even able to be around me, I looked damn near like a skeleton.” He continued.

“She’s not like that.” Lee responded dimly, leaning back into his chair. 

“You’re right.” 

Lee was so damn tired, heaviness pulling on every part of his being. But he had to be there when you woke up. 

“You know.. you know she used to cry over you?” 

Arthur glanced at Lee. 

“For the longest time I couldn’t figure it out, it would be small things, a mention of a journal, candy, anything. She’d tried to hide it, until one day I finally asked her. Felt like shit of course, but I had to know.”

“Even at night, when I moved in with her, she’d cry late at night, small sniffles when she thought I was sleeping. I’d wake up and feel so broken about it, maybe even a bit jealous. I wondered why she still cried over you.” Lee’s eyes were clouded with emotion. Dark, and glossy. 

“I thought about her every night,” Arthur cleared his throat after a moment. 

“I had no idea if she was alive or six feet under. But I couldn’t search for her - I couldn’t. I wasn’t well enough.” 

“How’d you make it out alive?” Lee asked him.

“A friend of mine found me. Rushed me back to a native reservation, wasn’t even much of one at the time. An older woman there kept me alive. I like to think she was some sort of guardian sent to save me, and she did, and once her mission was done she died.” Arthur nodded, confessing his story. 

“I’m sorry about all this.” Lee finally said.

“Me too.” 

•••

Time passed slower while in hospitals, or perhaps waiting was what made it so unbearable. Nurses came and checked on you, but you were still out of it and only somewhat responsive. It seemed more so like you were sleeping, peaceful and with the occasional slight movement. That was a good sign at least. 

When eight rolled around everyone was holding their breath, at least Lee was. His foot tapping on the floor restlessly. Arthur scribbled away in a black journal, eyes burrowed in thought. 

Minutes ticked on, it was almost nine now. Lee was sure you’d never wake up then, but when you began to stir he changed his mind. 

It started with a small flicker of your eyelashes, then a slight head move and then your arms. Lee watched you intently, his brown eyes gazing your body. 

Your eyes slowly opened, and blinked a few more times. 

“Oh thank god.” Lee said, rushing to your side. He kneeled next to your bed, holding your hand in his. 

“Lee?” You asked him, still adjusting to the bright lights. 

“I’m here. Shh.” Lee smiled with tears welling in his eyes. He didn’t care if he looked stupid and he sure as hell didn’t care about all the eyes watching him. 

You tried to sit up but Lee lightly pushed you back down. Your head hurt like hell, and so did your arm. 

“Arthur?” You said, looking off towards Arthur. 

“I’m here, sweetheart.” Arthur smiled too.

“Don’t ever do that again.” Lee laughed through his tears. You nodded in response. Lee’s hands gingerly caressed your own. 

“My head hurts.” You groaned.

“I know it does, sweetheart. You gotta pull through for us, okay?” Arthur responded. 

Arthur felt like an intruder. Like he wasn’t supposed to see this reunion. He felt like a stranger even next to you. 

Arthur desperately needed to talk to you, you would just have to listen. 

He remembered the chocolate bar in his pocket then. A small tradition. Arthur pulled it out. He stared at it in his hands as Lee said something to you he couldn’t hear. 

Then you spoke.

“You always did give me that brand.” 

Arthur walked closer to your bed, handing the chocolate bar to your outstretched hand. 

“Chocolate?” Lee asked. 

“It’s an old tradition.. when Arthur first saved me he had a chocolate bar in his pocket. It was the only thing he had and I was starved, so I nearly gobbled it up. It’s been a tradition ever since then, every time I’ve been hurt he’s given me a candy bar.” You said, remembering the story. 

_ “We got a girl over here, Dutch!” Arthur shouted. The entire place smelled of carnage, a smell Arthur had become acquainted with after joining Dutch.  _

_ You were wide eyed and cowering in the corner of the room, in nothing more than a dirty, torn white gown.  _

_ “I ain’t gonna hurt you, miss.” Arthur said, slowly walking towards you. He raised his hands up. You were silent, staring at him with fearful eyes.  _

_ Dutch and John entered the room and you flinched. Arthur motioned them to stand back, and they did.  _

_ Your bottom lip quivered as Arthur approached you, backing further into the wall. _

_ “I’m not going to hurt you, I promise. What’s your name, miss?” Arthur asked you, stopping in place.  _

_ Your small voice gave him your name, flickering your eyes between John and Dutch.  _

_ “That’s a pretty name. My name is Arthur.” He smiled at you. _

_ You stared at him with woeful eyes. _

_ “Are the bad men gone?” You asked him quietly.  _

_ Arthur nodded. You ran up to him, pouncing from your corner. You wrapped your arms around him and wept. Arthur was hesitant, but slowly wrapped his arms around you.  _

_ “You’re safe.” He mumbled.  _

_ Once the men took everything they could, Arthur waited outside with you, finally free from your cage. You were gaunt, and looked like hell had ripped through you.  _

_ Arthur’s horse whinnied as you ran your hands over it’s silky head. It had been too long since you’ve seen a horse, or even been outside for that matter. Arthur wondered who you were or how you even ended up with that gang.  _

_ You were still shaking, despite the heat of the desert air.  _

_ “Are you hungry, miss?” Arthur asked you.  _

_ You nodded quickly. It had been days since they had fed you.  _

_ Arthur felt around in his pocket, feeling a rectangular object. He pulled it out, it was the chocolate bar he had been saving for later. Arthur learned he had quite the sweet tooth after joining Dutch, after all, he finally had money to buy chocolate.  _

_ He didn’t mind giving it to you, so he held it out. You eyed the chocolate bar suspiciously.  _

_ “It’s not poisoned.. or rotten?”  _

_ “No, no, not of that sort.” Arthur laughed.  _

_ You snatched the bar from his hands, you tore the package open and relished the sweet smell. You took a small bite, chewing slowly and then a giant one. And then another, and another.  _

_ “Woah! Slow down or you’ll make yourself sick.” He told you.  _

_ You moved the chocolate away from your face, giving him a grin. You had chocolate all over your face, but he was happy to see you smile. _

•••

Lee still fretted over you, as you waited for the doctor to come treat you. You just wanted to tell him to back off, but you knew better than to yell at him, he was just worried. You ate your chocolate, wondering how in the hell you had gotten yourself into this whole mess. 

The doctor was a middle aged man, with light hair and tired eyes. 

“Glad to finally see you awake, Mrs. Rinascita.” He said, setting down his clipboard. 

Arthur looked from you to Lee and scowled. Your last name was Morgan, not Rinascita.

“Seems you gave your husband quite the scare,” He chuckled, pulling out a stethoscope. You laughed softly. He placed the stethoscope on your chest and listened. 

“Can you tell me what happened, miss?” He spoke slowly. 

You bit your bottom lip, a habit you had when nervous. 

“I was attacked by a wolf. I made it out and ran for miles it seemed, before I collapsed on the main road.” You sighed, eyeing Lee’s stunned face. 

“Do you have a headache of that sort, dizziness, perhaps?” 

“I have a headache, but no dizziness.” 

“I think you may be a little dehydrated, how long would you say you ran?” 

“I ran for hours, then the wolf came and I ran for a while too.” You said, making sure to leave out the fact that you were running from the men Lee sent out after you. 

The doctor nodded, picking up his clipboard and scribbling something down. 

“Well, I think you may just be exhausted and dehydrated from all that running. We’ll make sure that wound doesn’t get infected, so after we do that you’ll be all good to go.” The doctor smiled. 

“That’s good news, doc.” Lee sighed. 

Arthur simply stood and watched, he was never fond of doctors anyways. 

•••

Once the nurses reapplied your bandages and made sure to give you lots of water, they pulled you away from your boys for a private examination, after that they sent you on your merry way.Your face still felt swollen and a few of the scratches would surely leave a scar. You wondered if John would have laughed at you now. 

Lee still had to head back to the police station to fill out the rest of the report, but for now all he wanted was to be with you. Arthur walked next to you as you traveled down the cobblestone streets of Richfield. Your feet were blistered, but you didn’t complain.

Everything still felt different, and while your expedition away from the men felt freeing, everything had still been changed. It changed the second Arthur stepped foot back into your life, back from the grave. The world felt like it had been split in two, and you were stuck in the middle. 

When you arrived back at the general store, you felt relieved to see your home. It was old, rickety and worn, but it was home. Lee was home, and Arthur was too. 

Lee held the door for you and Arthur as you walked in. 

“So..” You trailed off, leaning against the counter, you held your elbow.

“So,” Lee continued. 

Arthur looked at the both of you. He had to be alone with you, even for just a second. 

“We need to talk. Just you and I, alone.” Arthur said to you. Lee nodded, biting the inside of his cheek. He walked away, to the stairwell, before walking up he looked at you once more as he reached the first step. Lee looked at you like he was begging you to make the right choice.

You sure as hell hoped you would.

•••  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	14. Sunlight and Storms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Equally sacred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit; the cut off between the canon ending and AU ending is this chapter, the next chapter won’t really make much of a difference if you do read it, but just so you know the split is here.
> 
> Wow! The end is near haha!  
> I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter.. I know I did >:3c  
> Sorry for the hiatus, been working on lots of other things. A majority of my works on my tumblr @darlingsdevil , but some are on here too :) 
> 
> We’ve got two more regular chapters and then the epilogue, then the AU ending and the AU epilogue.

You waited for Lee’s heavy footsteps to reach the second floor before speaking. You weren’t sure what to say, no comprehensible sentence could be formed. All you knew was that Arthur was alive, he was alive and he was here standing in front of you. 

God, he was handsome. Arthur leaned against the counter next to you, his shoulders brushing against yours. 

“How’d you end up here?” Arthur asked first. You could tell there was more he wanted to say.

“We stopped here for awhile. I decided this is where I wanted to stay and the Marston’s left,” You explained, this was so much harder than you were expecting.

“How did you find me, Arthur?” You turned to face him. 

“John sent a letter,” He responded, looking into your eyes. His eyes were brighter than the last time you saw him, all those months ago when you said goodbye. 

“How is John?” 

“I’m sure he’s gotten into some trouble one way or another,” Arthur chuckled lightly. You couldn’t break his gaze, you stared at him like he was the only thing in the universe, the only thing you would ever see again. 

Arthur was here, he was standing next to you, he was living, he was breathing. Arthur was still yours, but were you still his? The lines had been blurred over the last few months, you had given up Arthur the moment you told Lee you loved him, and you were contempt with that for a while. After all, in your minds eye, Arthur was dead, but he was here now. 

“Arthur, can I ask you a question?” After not seeing him for so long, it felt strange to talk to him.

Arthur nodded, “Course, honey, you can ask me anything.” 

Arthur’s eyes were like emeralds, dazzling like the waters of Richfield. Such a stark a contrast to the dark brown eyes of Lee. Lee’s eyes were like a warm fire in the cold woods, Arthur’s were similar to the open sky on a warm summer's day. Equally intriguing. 

“How did you make it out?”

Arthur inhaled deeply, breaking his gaze away from you. 

“Charles. He found me, took me back to Wapiti, a woman there helped me get better. Mahala, was her name. She was like the mom I never had.” 

You stared at him again, your breath suddenly getting caught in your throat. You threw your arms around him, falling into his chest. Arthur felt like home, something you had even realized you had missed. Tears fell freely from your eyes, you couldn’t hold back any longer.

“I’ve missed you,” You mumbled into his chest, he brushed your hair lightly. Tears fell onto his shirt, but Arthur didn’t mind, nothing in this whole world could pull him away from you. 

His voice was like whiskey, “I know. I missed you too.” 

You cried harder. The walls you had so intricately placed up to guard you from the life you left behind came crashing down. The avoidance of talking about Arthur, your friends, your old family. None of that mattered now. All that mattered was that Arthur was alive. 

“What am I gonna do, Arthur?” You asked him quietly, your voice barely heard. 

“I don’t know, sweetheart. You gotta do what you wanna do, not play two sides at once.” 

“The wedding is in less than two weeks.” 

“It’ll all be okay by then.” Arthur continued brushing your hair, patting down the unruly pieces. 

“Are you sure?” 

“I am,” Arthur pulled away from you. Tears stained your face. 

You were being torn between two men, you loved both dearly. You could barely wrap your head around having to choose, it was inevitable of course. Lee was the new, comforting escape from the rugged life you had known, the one you worked so hard to run away from. Arthur was the man who had been with you since day one, the one who had saved you from a life of captivity. 

Your life would have been totally different if Arthur had never gotten that disease, the disease that tore you away from him even in his ‘final’ moments. You would have never ended up in Richfield, instead living in some quiet home in West Elizabeth like you had always hoped. A ranch, with animals, sprawling fields. A few children perhaps, a daughter that looked like Arthur, a son that looked like you. A peaceful life like you had always dreamed of. Was it wrong of you to wish you had never ended up in Richfield? Was it wrong of you to wish you had never met Lee? Lee was your fiancé, the man you loved. But you also loved Arthur. 

“I’m so sorry, Arthur.” 

“It ain’t your fault, you couldn’t have known.” Arthur’s face broke your heart. Like he had already accepted his fate, assuming you would pick Lee. He wouldn’t want to tear you from your fiancé, even if you were his first. 

“I don’t want to leave you.” Tears started falling again, like raindrops on the roof of the apartment.

“I don’t want you to leave me either. But I ain’t gonna stop you from what you want.” 

“I can’t - I can’t do this.” You started panicking, your chest felt tight. What did you want? What was the choice? Arthur’s eyes widened at your worried face. You turned away from Arthur, placing your hands on the counter to balance yourself. 

Arthur or Lee? 

Past or present? 

You felt dizzy, Arthur’s words blurring in your ears. The lights were too bright in the store, pressure seemingly slowly building up in your head. Tears welled in your eyes, panic rising in you. 

Arthur pulled you close to him, just his presence was comforting. He was your grounding force. 

“Shhh.. it’ll be alright,” Arthur whispered to you, your face nuzzled next to his chest. Your chest heaved with sobs, you could barely breathe.

“Why didn’t you look for me sooner, Arthur?” You finally asked him. All of this could have been avoided if he had just come sooner. 

Arthur paused, “I was sick for a long, long time. I could barely get out of bed, let alone look for you across the country.” 

“I’m sorry,” You sniffled. Arthur rubbed your back soothingly, you breathing finally slowing. 

You looked up at Arthur, through tear filled eyes, Arthur still thought you were the most beautiful thing in the world, you were a goddess in his eyes, even if you were crying. 

The love you felt in his arms was undeniable, like his hold was exactly where you were meant to be. Two lovers connected by fate itself. 

You leaned up to him, feeling the emotion between you and Arthur. It was almost electric, your heart soared as you looked up at your husband. 

Arthur was really here. 

Arthur leaned forward, gently held your face, pressing a soft kiss on your lips. Your eyes fluttered shut, your heart pounding. It was something you never thought you would ever experience again from him. He kissed you so sweetly, yet so passionately, it felt just like the first time. 

When Arthur pulled away, your lips still relishing his warmth, you looked at him with love filled eyes. It felt like nothing in this world could tear you from him, not even death itself. 

Lee’s footsteps broke you from your trance, and you quickly took a step away from Arthur. Arthur’s face flashed with hurt as you looked towards Lee. 

“I need to go back to the police station. Will you come with me and fill out the rest of the report?” Lee asked you, shutting the door to the staircase behind him. 

You nodded, “Sure, can you let me change first?” 

You already felt guilty, like you betrayed Lee. But Arthur’s kiss just felt so right, it confused you to no end. 

“Yeah. My father's asleep by the way,” Lee said, grabbing his coat from the rack. 

“We both know your father wouldn’t wake up if a gun was shot right next to your ear,” You laughed playfully, trying to hide the turmoil that was brewing inside.

“You’re probably right,” Lee responded with a laugh of his own. Arthur leaned silently against the counter, watching the two of you interact. There was something so natural between you and Lee. The conversations always seemed to flow. 

You slowly walked up the steps, feeling closer and farther away than you had ever been from either of them.

Mr. Rinascita’s soft snores could be heard through the door as you reached the first platform. You wondered if he knew you were home. 

It felt almost strange to be in your apartment again, everything the same way you had left it. The same disheveled sheets. The only thing new was the empty bottle of bourbon on the counter. It was disheartening knowing Lee resorted to drinking, it seemed a thousand emotions would be ripping through you tonight. It was a mistake to run away, even if it was just what you had needed. You had people waiting for you at home, and Lee clearly hadn’t taken it lightly. Arthur was used to your impulsiveness, but Lee wasn’t. 

You slowly shimmied out of your dirty clothes and put on a new skirt and a white blouse. You examined your battered body in the mirror, scratches littered your face, your feet still ached and you felt undeniably tired, your limbs feeling heavy. All you wanted to do was crash in your soft bed. Your locket remained in pristine condition, the pearl in the center still as shiny as ever. It seemed the wolf had spared your most prized possession. 

You couldn’t shake the guilt that inched in your blood, you had kissed Arthur, and you were to be married in less than two weeks. Arthur was your husband, but Lee was your fiancé, and you couldn’t cheat on Lee. 

When you came back down, no longer in your wolf torn clothes, Lee gave you a big smile, innocent and playful. Arthur simply stared at the floor, barely readable. You avoided looking at Arthur, he would break your heart if you did. 

Lee grabbed your coat for you, and held the door open. You stepped outside into the bright street. It seemed Richfield, the land of new opportunity, was always bustling. 

You turned to look at Arthur through the glass, as Lee ushered you away. Arthur could easily see the guilt on your face the moment you looked at Lee. 

Once he was out of view, you faced forward. 

“We should talk too, you know. We haven’t really gotten the chance,” Lee told you, his hand around your waist. 

You felt uneasy at another discussion, you would have to choose one of them in the end, but in the meantime you would have to deal with both of their worries about losing you. You couldn’t imagine breaking either of their hearts. 

“We haven’t been to the pier in a while,” You responded. 

“Yeah we could go there after we visit the police station. I’m sure it won’t take long.” 

•••

The police station trip was short. Lee introduced you to an officer, Mr. Clark. You answered all the questions he threw at you with ease, after all you were once a conwoman, Hosea’s right hand woman in all jobs. Even jabbing questions, it was more like an interrogation than a report. You assumed Officer Clark was simply a thorough man.

You never felt comfortable around the police, after living as an outlaw for your whole life, you had to keep reminding yourself you weren’t here to be persecuted. After all, Officer Clark was just doing his job. 

When you left with Lee, your uneasiness did not go away. It started like a slow and steady stream, the closer you got to the pier it rose in you like whitecaps on a windy day. The thought of kissing Arthur made your head spin, and then going and talking with Lee about everything? That was a recipe for a mean headache.

When you finally arrived at the pier, it was crowded with people. Couples strolled, fishermen cast out their lines and children laughed playfully, zigzagging through the crowds. The pier became less crowded the further you walked, after all it was incredibly long. The waves lapped gently against the sides of the pier, it calmed your nerves slightly. 

Lee was tense too, you could feel his tense shoulders every time they brushed against yours. It felt strange to do something so domestic with him after the events of the week. When you finally reached the end of the pier, you leaned against the railing.

“It looks like it might storm,” Lee began, looking up towards the overcast sky. It was sunny when you had left, but it seemed Mother Nature had other plans for the afternoon. 

“It might,” You responded dimly. There was a moment of silence between you, you stared out over the waters. Lee leaned next to you, you glanced at him briefly.

“My father isn’t doing too good. He told me he stopped taking his medicine,” Lee sighed. 

“What? Why would he do that?” Your mouth agape. 

“He spewed some bullshit about ‘not wanting to waste away’.” Lee bit his lip, glancing at you. 

“Oh my god,” You gasped, covering your mouth with your hands. Neither you or Lee would be able to convince Mr. Rinascita, you couldn’t force someone to live. 

“I tried to tell him to go back to the doctor for more, but he wouldn’t listen to me.” 

”But he’ll die if he stops taking his medicine.” 

“I know. He's dying. My father is dying.” Lee choked out. 

You reached out towards him, pulling you close to him, you wrapped your arms around his torso. Lee melted into your touch.

“I’m so sorry, Lee,” You spoke quietly. 

“I thought we had more time..” Lee mumbled. You brushed his hair. You could feel Lee shake under you. You had never felt more guilty in your entire life. You ran away, you kissed Arthur, Lee’s father signed his life away. Lee had lost so much. 

“I don’t think he will even be well enough to go to the wedding.. I think we’ll have to move it to the end of the week.” 

You felt like you had been slapped in the face. 

“The end of the week?” You managed to choke out. 

“I know it’s not what you imagined.” Lee pulled away from your hold. Your eyes wide, processing what he had said. 

You shook your head. “I’m not sure what to do. I don’t want to leave you,” You confessed to him, searching his eyes. 

The wind picked up, the rain would start falling soon. 

“You already have.” Lee smiled at you sadly. 

“What? Lee, what are you saying?” You asked him, your heart dropping to your stomach. The wind whipped your hair around. 

“I saw you, I saw you kiss him.” 

You gasped. Lee turned away from you. You had betrayed Lee, the man you loved dearly. And he knew it too. 

“I-” You began, but Lee cut you off. 

“I saw it the moment you laid eyes on him. You had already chosen him, it’s always been him,” Lee said bitterly, turning back to face you. 

The rain started. Thunder boomed in the distance. 

“That’s not true,” Your voice rose. 

“Why? Why did you have to run away?” Lee shouted, his face contorted with pain. 

Tears came as quickly as the rain had started.

“I couldn’t handle it, Lee. I couldn’t! I didn’t mean to hurt you!” You sobbed, your face feeling hot. Your chest felt heavy, Lee’s heartbroken face would forever be ingrained in your mind. 

The rain soaked your clothes, heavy droplets falling over Lee’s face. 

Lee was a storm. And he would rain down today. 

“Well you fucking did,” Lee fell to the ground, his chest heaving. You fell next to him, holding him in your arms. You both stayed that way for a while, both crying. Even the sky expressed it’s sorrow for you. The rain continued falling relentlessly. 

“Don’t leave me, please,” Lee’s voice broke. It was louder than the thunder, than all the noise in the entire universe. He gripped you so tightly, like the moment you let him go you would disappear. And it broke your heart. 

Lee had lost everything there was to lose. He couldn’t lose you. 

In that moment, your mind was made up. You knew what your choice was.

The storm had came. Lee was the storm in your life. Coming abruptly, changing everything. 


	15. Full Circle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The big day. All rejoice!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for my long hiatus, not been super motivated lately so I made this chapter extra long for you guys! Longer than any thing I’ve written before (!!). 
> 
> I promise I sort have been doing productive things.. I guess. Listening to music (Hozier, Lord Huron, Gregory Alan Isakov and the Oh Hello’s are what got this chapter done), playing fallout 76 (I know), working, schoolwork, planning other fics (I have a big announcement coming up!!!)
> 
> IMPORTANT PLEASE READ: I wanted to clear some things up in terms of plot hole. My dumbass mistakenly has said that Reader has been in the gang for 15 years, not true - it’s been around 10, but a little less than John (like 3 ish months after him). I have also previously said that John and Reader joined the gang together, again, not true but I already fixed it. Reader joined the gang after John after Arthur saved her from the gang who kidnapped her. Hope this wasn’t too confusing. 
> 
> As for the ending... yeah.. next chapter, and then epilogue. Not sure that many of you will stay around for the AU - which will be posted SEPARATE, after you read the actual ending >:3c 
> 
> Anyways, here we go.

_ Shady Belle was an interesting place for a wedding, it seemed. You had been ushered away from Arthur in the morning, and carted away to Saint Denis with the rest of the women, claiming Shady Belle would be too chaotic to get ready in, which really meant they didn’t want you to get ready with the men around. They had raided your room when the sun rose, waking Arthur too. You were barely able to kiss him goodbye, they carted you out of the room that fast. You wanted to lie next to him all morning, enveloped in his warmth, but your friends had different plans.  _

_ Saint Denis was such a difference compared to Chicago, the city you grew up in. You were an orphan living in the cold streets, just barely getting by. You worked in a textile factory for as long as you could remember. You lived in a cheap, one bedroom apartment, before that you simply slept in alleyways with other orphans, huddling by fires. You were uneducated, poor, and always hungry. A man kidnapped you on your way home from work one late evening, and the next thing you knew you were in a cabin in the desert, surrounded by men with guns and a nasty look on their face. Arthur was your savior, Dutch was your teacher, John was your brother, Abigail was your sister, Hosea was your father and the Van der Linde gang was your family.  _

_ But that was a long time now. Your wedding was merely hours away.  _

_ Arthur was nervous about the whole thing, he didn’t want to make a big deal out of the wedding but Dutch decided otherwise. Dutch thought a wedding was exactly what the entire gang needed, to boost everyone’s morals he had told you. You were beyond nervous for your big day, but with Arthur by your side, the impossible became possible.  _

_ Miss Grimshaw was the head of it all, the mastermind of the party. She set everything on a strict schedule, where everyone needed to be and when. She was a godsend during this time, otherwise the wedding would no doubt end up in a shed with you wearing a white sheet as a wedding dress.  _

_ Mary Beth was absolutely bouncing off the walls at the idea of a wedding, she thought it was incredibly romantic — two outlaws falling in love. It was something out of those novels she adores. _

_ Saint Denis was hot, humid, and made you feel sticky with sweat. It didn’t help you would be wearing a heavy dress later that day either, but you didn’t mind. Nothing could or would bring you down today.  _

_ The first stop to your magical day was the salon. You got your hair trimmed and styled, as well as some makeup, keeping it simple. A few of the other women got their hair done as well. They all looked beautiful. The women could not hide their excitement for you, even a few patrons of the salon came up and congratulated you. Their talk seemingly echoed off the walls.  _

_ Abigail put the hair clip in your styled hair, it was a beautiful piece, elegant and dazzling. It was gold with a large pearl at the top and smaller jewels surrounding it. It matched your locket perfectly. Arthur had bought the hair clip for you a few days before.  _

_ When you were ready to leave the salon, it was time for the dress store, where you had left the dress. You didn’t want Arthur to see it, and it would no doubt get soiled at Shady Belle. Some of the other women had bought new dresses for the special occasion as well. _

_ You picked it up from the counter, and walked over to the dressing room. All the women sat down on the benches outside of the dressing room, waiting for the big reveal. A few of them had already seen it, as they had gone with you when you picked it out, but none of them had seen you in your full wedding attire.  _

_ When you slipped it on over your undergarments you felt like you were floating on a cloud. You were absolutely beautiful. You felt like you could conquer the world in the dress. It was incredibly pretty, it had a loose layered bodice, with lace woven in, long ruffled sleeves and an a-line skirt. You felt your heart strings pull at the mere sight of it, you wondered what Arthur would think of it.  _

_ You slowly pushed the door open, hearing your loud heartbeat in your ears. You heard a wave of audible gasps, and then a few squeals, you eyed your white heels nervously, hesitantly looking up at all their faces.  _

_ They were all smiling, a few covering their mouths in joy.  _

_ “You look so pretty!” Tilly shouted, the rest of the women agreed. You smiled shyly, doing a small twirl.  _

_ “I really like the dress,” You said, feeling the cloth sway with you.  _

_ “I’d be surprised if Arthur didn’t drop dead the moment he sees you,” Mary Beth said playfully.  _

_ “Do you really think so?” You questioned.  _

_ “Of course. The man will have a heart attack right there, on the altar,” Molly responded.  _

_ You giggled, “I don’t want that to happen!”  _

_ “You look so beautiful,” Mary Beth repeated. You nodded her head at her, a smile on your lips.  _

_ “I’m so nervous though,” You confessed, sitting down next to Miss Grimshaw. You gripped the edge of the wooden bench, hoping to calm your nerves. _

_ “It’s normal to be nervous, if you aren’t, there’s something wrong.” Sadie was the only married one in the gang, you trusted her advice. _

_ “What if something goes wrong?”  _

_ “Nothing will be going wrong today, everyone is going to make sure nothing bad happens,” Abigail reassured you.  _

_ “Are you sure? I mean what if Arthur suddenly gets cold feet? What if O’Driscolls raid our camp?”  _

_ “If the O’Driscolls try to mess up your day, they’ll have to get through me,” Sadie said rather determinedly, a strange glint in her eye. You would not want to be an O’Driscoll when Sadie Adler was around, or an O’Driscoll in general for that matter.  _

_ “Arthur would never turn his back on you. We all see the way he looks at you,” Mary Beth said, a noise of agreement was heard. Mary Beth was right, Arthur would never turn his back on you, you were sure of it. _

_ “Arthur and you do make a handsome couple. I can tell you’re really in love,” Molly responded. _

_ “Thank you, Molly.” You smiled at her.  _

_ “We best be getting going, we wouldn’t want her to miss her big day,” Karen reminded everyone. It was getting late after all, there were still some things to do before the ceremony, such as making sure all the men were getting ready instead of getting drunk off their asses. Luckily, most of the preparations were done the night before, but there were still some finishing touches required.  _

_ Everyone fretted for you and Arthur to simply sit back and let everyone get your wedding prepared for you. You were wary of coming off as lazy at first, but the gang assured you it was your turn to sit back and relax, after all weddings were supposed to be happy and stress free. So you let everyone pitch in, even Uncle helped.  _

_ “Let’s head back then. The bouquet still needs the ribbons in it, we need to make sure dinner is being prepared-” Miss Grimshaw already began barking orders, Karen and Tilly both groaned. Everyone began to get up, gathering all their belongings.  _

_ “And you, Miss Morgan, we need you to head inside immediately once we arrive, we can’t have your dress get dirty,” Miss Grimshaw told you as you walked through the streets to get to the wagons.  _

_ “And don’t let Arthur see you, it’s bad luck, you know,” Sadie's voice rang out from behind you. _

_ “I know!”  _

•••

_ When the rowdy wagons finally came to a stop in front of Shady Belle, you were immediately taken up to Abigail’s room. She shielded you from the eyes of the men, rushing you up the staircase. Abigail and Sadie were not taking the superstitions lightly it seemed. She kicked John out of the room, but Jack was allowed to stay.  _

_ You walked over to the window, Abigail sat down on the rickety bed. You slowly pushed the curtains out of the way, looking down to the ground below. Dutch was giving a speech it seemed, Arthur next to him. Your breath was almost stolen from you the moment you laid eyes on him, he was so incredibly handsome. He wasn’t dressed yet, you were glad you hadn’t spotted him in his suit. He was standing proud next to Dutch, Hosea on the other side of him. You watched them for awhile, before letting the curtains fall back into place.  _

_ “Are you ever going to have a wedding with John?” You turned to Abigail as she brushed her hair on the bed.  _

_ Abigail gave you a look,“Knowing John, probably not.”  _

_ You chuckled lightly, “Well, if you ever do, I want to be there.”  _

_ “You’ll be the first invited,” She responded. You took the brush from her hands and slowly began getting rid of all the knots in her hair. You shifted behind her, making sure to not crease your dress.  _

_ “I still can’t believe you two are getting married. I remember when I caught you two kissing behind that wagon,” She laughed, remembering the awkward moment.  _

_ “He was drunk off his ass and I was too. It wasn’t much of a kiss, more like we were eating eachothers face.”  _

_ “Yeah but, it was still a kiss, right?”  _

_ “I guess it was our first kiss. But our first sweet kiss was the day after when he officially asked me out,” You sighed sweetly.  _

_ “John was horrified. I still remember the look on his face when you both arrived back in camp holding hands,” Abigail laughed.  _

_ “Hosea always knew. Dutch knew too. We were ogling each other for so long, it was kinda hard not to know.”  _

_ “You told me first though, remember?” Abigail said.  _

_ “Yeah, I do. And then the next day you went into town and bought a locket for me so I could put Arthur’s photo in it.”  _

_ You continued brushing Abigail’s locks. Abigail was the closest thing to a sister you had ever gotten. You stood up for her when the rest of the men saw her as a whore, you showed them she was more than that. You stayed by her side when John left her with a newborn. You had even helped give birth to Jack.  _

_ Arthur was closer to John for obvious reasons, but you were still John’s sister too. You were both furious at John when he left. John had betrayed you and Abigail, things were still rocky. Arthur understood what it was like to have a child, it wasn’t easy, but at least he had stayed for Eliza, you had met her twice, she was kind and respectful. Isaac was a smart boy, and looked a lot like Arthur. Arthur was distant for a while after he found out they both died.  _

_ “It took you awhile to find the right photo to put in it.”  _

_ “It did. I had to get him to take the photo in the first place. I remember I told him it was for a job!” You laughed.  _

_ “I’m sure he already suspected it.”  _

_ “Probably. I never was a good liar around Arthur,” You said.  _

_ “I’m so glad he ended up with you.. Mary and him were a troubled pair.” _

_ “Trust me, I know.” Mary hated you and you hated her. It was the final straw when Mary began talking about you, trying to pull Arthur away from you, putting ideas into his head, and Arthur stopped putting up with it. At the time, you were no rival to Mary, you were more like his annoying little sister. His volatile little sister. You were a lot wilder in those days, no wonder Mary saw you as a threat. _

_ “But honestly, you two are a wonderful couple. Arthur is lucky to have you,” Abigail said sincerely.  _

_ “Thank you,” You responded. You were finally done brushing her hair, you set the hairbrush down and sat down on the edge of the bed. _

_ “I’m so nervous about this wedding,” You confessed to her, setting your hands in your lap.  _

_ “You have nothing to worry about,” Abigail looked at you. You looked up at her. Her eyes shimmered with pride.  _

_ “I don’t even know why I’m worried, I just am.” _

_ “Well I’ll be with you the entire time, you’re my sister, (Y/N). And sisters stick together.”  _

_ “Thank you, Abi.” You leaned forward and gave her a hug, your eyes welling with tears of happiness.  _

_ When she let go, she sat up from the bed, walking over to the window. She looked down at the scene below with watchful eyes. _

_ “John looks like he just woke up. That damned fool,” Abigail muttered, she turned to Jack, who had been playing with a few pieces of yarn and wood. You nearly laughed at the pitiful sight, you would have to buy him some real toys when you went back into the city. Arthur and you had briefly discussed having children, you had practically raised Jack, with Abigail. Arthur decided once things settled down and Dutch’s plan to go to Tahiti or wherever he decided at the time finally worked, then would be the time. You prayed it would be soon, Arthur would make a wonderful father. You wanted to get away from this life so desperately, you were tired of running, you were tired of killing. All you wanted was a family with Arthur.  _

_ You had lived the life of running, fighting to stay alive, killing without second thought. All you wanted was peace.  _

_ Abigail picked up Jack, letting out a quiet groan. Jack was getting big, you remember when you first held him, those big eyes looking up at you.  _

_ “Jack, do you want to go get what you made your Aunt?” Abigail asked Jack. Jack looked at you with big doe eyes, smiling widely.  _

_ “Yes, Mama,” He said, Abigail set him down, he walked towards the drawer by the window and reached open to pull it open. He barely even reached it. His small arms grabbed a small object from inside the drawer. Abigail put her hands on her hips, smiling at her boy. _

_ “He made it himself,” Abigail said as Jack set a flower crown in your hands. It was pretty with wildflowers he had picked. He watched you examine it, smiling brightly.  _

_ “I think Uncle Arthur will like it,” He told you.  _

_ “Oh, Jack! Thank you so much. This is beautiful.” You gave him a grin, putting the flower crown on. It really was a thoughtful gift.  _

_ “He picked a flower for Arthur too, so you would be matching,” Abigail revealed.  _

_ “Arthur likes flowers, did you know that, Jack? He’d never let any of us know, though,” You laughed, grabbing a bobby pin from a small box next to the brush, you secured the crown to your hair. Arthur was always drawing flowers in that journal, and in his old one he had kept pressed flowers. Arthur was a secret softy, there was no hiding that. Perhaps it’s why you fell for him, his secret side was so tender and loving, and when he realized he loved you too, that’s all you ever saw of him. He was nothing but kind - even when he called himself a bad man, you saw straight through that. Arthur was a kind man, kinder than any man you had ever met.  _

_ “I know,” Jack said simply, setting down next to you. He kicked his legs out in a back and forth motion. _

_ “How do you know?” You asked him, pretending to be shocked.  _

_ “Uncle Arthur told me he likes flowers.”  _

_ Abigail held back a laugh, looking at you. You glanced at her, giving her a look.  _

_ “Uncle Arthur told you he liked flowers?” You repeated.  _

_ “He told me when we were by the water. I found a flower and gave it to him,” Jack responded.  _

_ “I see. What flower did you give him?”  _

_ “It was a purple flower. Uncle Arthur drew it in his journal.” Jack got up from the bed and went back to his yarn and wood, plopping down on the hardwood floors.  _

_ You chatted aimlessly with Abigail for a few moments as she continued getting ready. You were beyond scared to walk down that aisle and face Arthur. The longer you waited, the worse your nerves got.  _

_ People came up and down the steps, but suddenly you realized that it was John and Arthur coming upstairs. You held your breath. Even Abigail stopped to listen. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as you heard them speak and walk further and further up the steps.  _

_ “John?” Abigail called out.  _

_ “What?” He responded, John was close to the door.  _

_ “Arthur’s not allowed in,” Abigail replied, she picked up her makeup brush and began applying blush to her face.  _

_ “I know. He’s not, he’s going to his room.” You could hear Arthur’s footsteps in the other room.  _

_ “Can I come in?” John asked after a moment of silence.  _

_ “Sure,” You said. The door opened and there was John. He still wasn’t dressed.  _

_ “You look good. I’m sure Arthur will be happy to see you.” John closed the door behind him, walking over to the dresser.  _

_ “Think so?” You asked playfully.  _

_ “Of course. Why wouldn’t he be?” He chuckled, John pulled out a pair of black slacks and a white shirt. It looked clean enough.  _

_ “She’s nervous,” Abigail told John. John looked at you over his shoulder.  _

_ “That so? Arthur is too.”  _

_ “Did he say anything about me?” You blurted out, feeling like a schoolgirl with a crush. John walked behind the folding screen in the corner of the room.  _

_ “He’s real excited to see you,” John said from behind the screen.  _

_ “I’m sure everyone out there is,” Abigail chimed in.  _

_ “Arthur wanted me to give you something,” John said as he walked out from behind the screen in his wedding outfit. He walked towards you, outstretching his palm. _

_ It was a chocolate bar. You smiled at it, taking it from John.  _

_ “What's up with you two and chocolate?” John asked you as he walked over to the cabinet, he leaned against it, watching Jack play with his yarn.  _

_ “It’s a long story, but he’s only supposed to give it to me when I’m injured though.”  _

_ “Maybe he just wanted to let you know he’s thinking of you,” Abigail spoke, she glared at John, you wondered what that meant.  _

_ “I don’t have anything to give him,” You sighed, staring at the chocolate bar. Arthur was always thinking ahead. _

_ “I’m sure he knows you’re thinking of him,” Abigail replied.  _

_ “Hopefully.” _

_ You couldn’t bring yourself to eat it, your nerves were too high. All food sounded incredibly unappetizing. You set the chocolate bar on the bedside table. Jack eyed it, his eyes nearly glowing. _

_ “You want the candy bar?” You asked Jack.  _

_ He nodded vigorously. Abigail rolled her eyes humorously.  _

_ “You can have it,” You told him. It was a gift from Arthur but Jack would have appreciated it even more than you could, and besides, the kid loves candy.  _

_ “Thank you, Auntie (Y/N),” He said, grabbing the chocolate bar with eager hands.  _

_ “I best be getting down there now, Dutch wants to talk to Arthur and me, good luck out there by the way,” John said, buttoning the top of his collar. He opened the door and left.  _

_ Jack continued eating his chocolate, you smiled at the boy. You wanted your own son or daughter so dearly, one with Arthur’s eyes and your hair. That’s all you wanted. You wanted out. As much as you loved your family - you wanted out. You had lived that way for so long, it was all you had ever known. But now you had a chance at freedom - to create your own family with Arthur.  _

_ But Arthur would never leave Dutch. And you knew that.  _

_ Deep down you knew.  _

_ You were tired of the running — tired of the plans, tired of it all. All you wanted was Arthur, him and nothing else. No gang — no killing. Just Arthur. _

_ You didn’t want to raise a child in the gang, that was a foolish dream. You knew how easily the child could go without a parent, you had seen it happen with Abigail and Jack, although John eventually returned.  
_

_ You were coming to terms with that though. In the world of an outlaw it was to live forever as an outlaw or die trying.  _

•••  
  


_ An hour passed - it was already almost time. A majority of the gang members had already left camp. Your nerves were skyrocketing and when Molly knocked on the door to tell you it was time you almost passed out. Abigail gently ushered you to the door. Your hands were shaking as you slowly opened it up, seeing Molly in her special dress.  _

_ The plan was to head to a small church where they held outdoor weddings behind the building, the venue backed up to a river so you would be standing by it saying your vows. It was not very far from Shady Belle. Churches were never quite Arthur’s style, so you opted for an outdoor wedding. _

_ You walked down the staircase slowly to the carriage outside, your hands were shaking wildly. Abigail held you tightly, Jack at her hip. The carriage was waiting outside for you. The camp was deserted behind you, it was strange to see. It was almost eerie, the lack of life, but you knew later tonight it would be bustling with it. _

_ Abigail helped you up into the carriage. Once everyone was in the driver set off. Your heart pounded in your ears, your stomach churning. _

_ “I’m so nervous.” You clasped your gloved hands tightly in your lap, as if it would somehow stop the shaking. Every turn, every jolt, it did not help with your nerves at all.  _

_ “I know, dear,” Molly said, putting her hands over yours. Abigail watched you sympathetically, she knew this wasn’t easy.  _

_ The carriage moved closer and closer to the venue. Arthur was surely feeling the same way, hopefully not to the same extent.  _

_ You were silent for most of the ride, Abigail and Molly talked fruitlessly, but you could not focus on their words. It felt like there were a thousand thoughts in your mind but not a single one was coming to your mind clearly, they were all shrouded in nervousness.  _

_ When the carriage suddenly came to a stop your heart jumped. You looked out the window and held your breath. This was it.  _

_ You were getting married. Today. Right now.  _

_ It was suddenly almost hard to wrap your mind around it. Abigail had to lightly nudge you out of the carriage, otherwise you would have been frozen in that seat.  _

_ You stepped out of the carriage, the sun was bright and slowly setting in the sky. By the time you would all get back tonight - it would surely be night.  _

_ Charles and John were waiting outside of the church for you. Every step closer to the church felt heavier and heavier, it was beginning to be hard to stand up straight.  _

_ “You look nice,” Charles said, holding the door open for you. Sunlight seeped in from the windows of the church, it was dusty inside. Sadie, Miss Grimshaw and Mary Beth sat on one of the pews, waiting for you.  _

_ “Thank you, Charles.”  _

_ Mary Beth gave you a small wave as you walked closer to them. Molly, Abigail, Jack and John behind you. It was hot and dry inside the church, it did not help that you were wearing a heavy dress either.  _

_ You opened your mouth to say something to Sadie, but Miss Grimshaw quickly cut you off. Molly walked out the back door to the ceremony.  _

_ “Arthur’s in the room behind the altar, with Dutch and Hosea. The Processional is starting in five minutes,” Miss Grimshaw reminded everyone. You nodded slowly. Five minutes felt like nothing. Abigail clipped the veil into your hair as Miss Grimshaw spoke. The veil was long and trailed to the floor, with lots of lace that was intricately woven.  _

_ “The order goes Dutch, Miss Grimshaw, Arthur, Charles, John, me, Mary Beth, Abigail, Jack and then our bride with Hosea,” Sadie read off from a piece of paper she had been holding.  _

_ “Then I’ll get out there with them, and you, Abigail, make sure the boy doesn’t drop the rings,” Miss Grimshaw finished, she turned swiftly towards the room behind the altar. Charles and John followed suit.  _

_ You sat down on one of the pews, your heeled foot tapping tirelessly against the floors. You tried to think of something calming, but nothing came to mind. It all was scrambled, your brain desperately grasping at a comprehensible thought.  _

_ “You’ll be fine,” Sadie told you as she leaned against the pew.  _

_ “You will be,” Mary Beth agreed. _

_ “I’m afraid I’ll mess up.”  _

_ “You won’t mess up, you’ll be fine,” Abigail beamed. The seconds ticked on, the women sticking to their own conversations after noticing the worry in your eyes. _

_ The music began and you immediately perked up, five minutes seemingly goes fast when your mind is a jumbled mess.  _

_ Sadie, Mary Beth and Abigail got up. Jack held onto his mother’s dress tightly. Abigail turned to smile at you sweetly as they walked closer and closer to the back. You gave her a small wave of goodbye. She mouthed “you’ll do great.” as she vanished behind the door.  _

_ The church was now completely deserted, it was now you and your thoughts. About a minute passed before Abigail knocked on the door. You hesitantly walked over to the looming door. Your heart beating wildly, like it would jump out of your chest.  _

_ You opened it and took a small breath, trying to calm your screaming nerves. In a few moments, you would see Arthur, and he would see you. And you would be his, and he would be yours. Years of yearning, wishing the other would be at their side, who knew it would come to this? He would be yours and you would be his. It was as simple as that.  _

_ Hosea was waiting on the other side for you, looking handsome as ever in his suit. He was the closest thing to a father you had ever gotten, it was only fitting he would walk you down the aisle. He smiled at the sight of you, unable to hide his pride.  _

_ The small compartment behind the church was small too. The door was open leading to the altar where Arthur was waiting for you, but a path obscured by trees hid it from you.  _

_ “You look beautiful,” He whispered, resting a hand on your shoulder. You stared at the door, waiting for your turn. You smiled politely, although you were not facing him.  _

_ The summer buzz of cicadas was heard even as the Procession played, a melodic tune. You waited for the music to change into your entrance.  _

_ “You’ll do fine out there, Arthur loves you,” Hosea’s words were quiet, but you could hear them loud as day. It was entirely true of course. Hosea was always right.  _

_ The music slowly shifted into a much slower song, and you knew. This was it. Hosea slid his arm through yours, your right arm holding the bouquet. You both slowly stepped out into the bright day. You felt like you were floating on a cloud — like nothing could ever bring you down. The dirt crunched underneath your feet as the aisle slowly came into view. Hosea’s arm was steady and soothing, his steps slow and methodical.  _

_ Worries drifted away as you slowly came into view, the wedding party rising at your arrival. The music continued to play a slow, beautiful tune, the cicadas humming happily and the rush of the river drumming thunderously.  _

_ And then there was Arthur, smiling at you like you were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his entire life. You were closer now to him, every step bringing you nearer and nearer to his heart.  _

_ Arthur was handsome. He was gorgeous. And he was yours — all yours. He was sporting a dashing black suit, perfectly tailored. The flower in his chest pocket was the same as the ones in your hair.  _

_ It was like there was a beam of light radiating from him, Arthur had always been your beacon even in the darkest of times. He was love itself.  _

_ You felt the eyes of your friends and family on you, but you could only focus on Arthur.  _

_ When you finally reached the altar, your hearts felt like they were being synced, beating as one rather than two. The officiant stood behind Arthur, underneath two trees with a small arch decorated with flowers, Sadie and Mary Beth waiting for you on the left, John and Charles next to Arthur.  _

_ Hosea let go off your arm, smiling the entire time. He took his place next to Dutch in the front row, you handed Abigail your bouquet and stood next to Arthur underneath the arch, he took your hands in his. His hands were rough and strong, but they felt like home.  _

_ You looked into those eyes of endless waves, you only felt love and happiness from him. He looked like a prince, like there was supposed to be a crown sitting on top of his head, rather than the flower one you wore.  _

_ The officiant began with a welcome as the guests sat down.  _

_ “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the presence of these witnesses, to join Arthur and (Y/N) in matrimony, which is commended to be honorable among all men; and therefore is not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, discreetly, advisedly and solemnly. Into this holy estate these two persons present now come to be joined. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace." The officiant said. This was really it, you kept reminding yourself. You both looked towards the crowd, for a fleeting moment you wondered if anyone would speak up. Arthur wondered the same, perhaps Micah would think he was funny and say something completely out of line, but he didn’t.  _

_ Arthur thought you were a goddess in your beautiful white gown. It looked exactly like something you would wear, the dress accented your body wonderfully, he couldn’t help but admire it. _

_ The officiant spoke some more, weddings, love, union, the beginning of your new life - but you could barely focus on it. Your only focus was Arthur. Your fiancé, your best friend, your husband in a matter of moments.  _

_ “And now the bride and the groom are to exchange vows,” The officiant proclaimed. He gave you your paper with the vows.  _

_ Tears slowly started forming in your eyes as you shakily held the paper, smiling through it all.  _

_ “I remember when you found me alone in that cabin, that day you saved me in more ways than one. You taught me to love, to laugh, to trust. You have been my best friend, my companion, my lover and now you will be my husband. You have stayed by me when I was sick, injured, drunk, crying, you were there for it all. And I shall be there for you, I will choose you every time. I devote myself to you, Arthur Morgan, in sickness and in health. For I am yours, and you are mine.” You squeezed Arthur’s hand tightly, feeling the words come out naturally, like you had been waiting to say them your entire life. His smile widened throughout your entire vow.  _

_ The officiant held the paper out to Arthur, he let go of your hand to take it. You remembered him saying writing vows was hard, saying that his words sounded like nonsense. But they weren’t nonsense, Arthur was a gifted writer, whether he knew it or not. The thoughts in his journal (which you rarely ever saw) were something precious. _

_ “My dear (Y/N), the first day I met you I knew I would like you. And I was right, and here we are now years later. It’s been a wild last few years, reckless too, but this is our first step into our new life, and we best not waste it. You are my love, you are my light, and I love you more than anything in this world. Nothing can or will separate us from now till the end of time,” He finished, his eyes brimming with love. Nothing could have prepared you for this moment, looking into his eyes and only feeling happiness. Like it was only you and him in this entire universe.  _

_ “Arthur, do you take Y/N L/N to be your lawfully wedded wife, through sickness and health, till death do you part?” The officiant asked. Arthur looked towards the man and nodded.  _

_ “I do.”  _

_ “And do you, Y/N, take Arthur Morgan to be your lawfully wedded husband, through sickness and health, till death do you part?” _

_ “I do,” You said to Arthur. You smiled uncontrollably, and tried to stop the tears that were threatening to spill out the corner of your eyes.  _

_ The officiant leaned down to take the rings from Jack.  _

_ “Arthur, take this ring and place it on her finger.” Arthur took the ring from the man, and you presented your left hand to him. He slipped it on effortlessly.  _

_ “I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness to you.”  _

_ “Y/N, take this ring and place it on his finger.” You grabbed the ring, feeling the weight of it in your hand, you slipped it on his strong hand.  _

_ “I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness to you,” You rang out loud and clear. Speaking only to him. Words that would forever bind you to him.  _

_ “And remember, love is an unbreakable bond, it is gratitude, it is faithfulness, it is kindness, it is forgiveness, it is everything good in this world. Lovers will always find a way back to each other,” The officiant said with parting words.  _

_ “With the power invested in me, I now declare you husband and wife. You may now kiss your bride.”  _

_ You both leaned in, he grabbed your waist, you took his face in your hand. And you kissed him, and you kissed him. His mouth against yours, it was a rushing moment, like you were soaring above the clouds. And you felt the love between, the hearts beating as one. Arthur was secure, he was your lifeline, he was your home. Arthur was yours.  _

_ Cheers were heard as you both retreated. You took his hand in his as you made your way back down the aisle. The crowd stood up for you, clapping the whole way. You would have to get used to the new weight on your finger, it was different than the engagement ring.  _

_ Once you were back on the path, you finally spoke, unable to hide your excitement.  _

_ “Gosh, I was so nervous all day, but when I got up there it wasn’t bad at all!” You exclaimed, walking closer to the church. The forest singing a merry tune for you. _

_ “I know, John had mentioned earlier that you was nervous,” Arthur replied. Your heart was beating quickly, but this time not with nerves, with excitement, with joy.  _

“ _And thank you, for the chocolate by the way. I ended up giving it to Jack, since he was ogling it the entire time,” You laughed, speaking quickly. Arthur held the door open for you as you entered the church._

_ “I was wondering if you would eat it or not.”  _

_ “Jack liked it. He also said he picked you that flower,” You told Arthur as you walked towards the front of the church, out towards the carriage _

_ “The flower crown looks nice in your hair, I think he made a good choice.” You opened the door to the carriage outside. The rest of the gang would come back to camp after you left. Arthur helped you into the carriage while the driver congratulated you two.  _

_ At 19 you expected to live the rest of your life with a gang of merciless strangers who beat and did horrible things to you, but now here you are, 10 years later - married to the man who had saved you. And he had saved you every day since then, reminding that you were worth the love he could give.  _

_ And he was yours, and you were his.  _

•••

_ The party still roared to life outside. There was a feast fit for a group of outlaws, cake, never ending drinks, a vibrant bonfire, poker, stories, toasts, talks. It was everything you hoped your wedding would be. Hosea and Dutch were like proud fathers the entire night. You even saw what looked like Miss Grimshaw wiping away some tears when Hosea gave his speech.  _

_ It was interesting to say the least — when the songs started, you knew a majority of the camp had gotten drunk. Barely anyone had retired for the night — besides Strauss, and Reverend who had already blacked out. They sang songs for you and Arthur, they sang songs about love, about sex (which made you blush and hide your face, while Arthur had a dumb smirk on his face). You had switched out of your dress after the ceremony and opted for a looser small white dress. _

_ When the crowd began saying the ‘Ring Dang Doo’ you groaned, knowing everyone would be looking at you. Arthur laughed as he sang along, watching you the entire time. The hoops and hollers were joyous as you hid your face in Arthur’s shoulder.  _

_ When the song was finally over you let out a sigh of relief, but you remained nuzzled into your husband's side. He was warm from drinking, and he had a happy glow to him. There was not another place you would rather be than to be next to him.  _

_ Hours passed smoothly, the songs became less rowdy as the party goers quickly dropped, hopefully not too hard. It was hard to believe your wedding day was over. You remained by Arthur’s side for a majority of the night. By the time Javier and John had packed up for the night — as well as an insufferably drunk Sean who’d fallen on his face getting up, it left only you and Arthur.  _

_ The fire crackled and sputtered as the remaining embers shuddered, praying to stay lit. The night was slowly coming to end, the final waves of darkness would be over soon, and light would wash over the terrain.  _

_ You were tired, you’d been awake for nearly a full day now. Your head rested on Arthur’s shoulder as he stared meaningfully into the fire, both of your eyelids heavy. You slowly blinked, trying to stay awake, to not fall asleep in the middle of camp.  _

_ “You know we could get away from this all, Arthur,” You mentioned to him, trying to suppress a yawn that was threatening to be released from your mouth.  _

_ Arthur replied with a questioning hum. _

_ You looked up at him, “We could get away from this life, you know, start our own family.”  _

_ “You know I want that, sweetheart. Life’s just a mess right now, not sure it’s the right time,” He sighed. You turned back to look at the dwindling fire.  _

_ “I know, Arthur, I do. I just — I want a child of our own, a house, a family.”  _

_ “We’ll have that one day.”  _

_ “You promise?”  _

_ “I promise.”  _

  * _••_



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you are all staying happy, healthy and safe.


	16. The Roll of a Dice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day has come. The scale will be tipped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may or may not have cried writing this. Like twice. 
> 
> This the finale, but there will be an epilogue! 
> 
> The AU ending and AU epilogue will be posted separate, and after the original epilogue is finished. 
> 
> I was really tempted to actually switch the endings and have the AU ending be the original ending.. but I decided to be nice to you guys and leave it as is.

In your heart you knew the sacrifice you had to make. You could choose between Arthur, the man who had saved you, the man you had known your entire life, the one who knew you the most. Or Lee, the man who showed you kindness when you swore the world was against you, the man who learned to love you despite your history, the man who could give you everything you had ever wanted in life — peace. 

It was a troubling choice. You didn’t want to pick, you dreaded it — but you knew that it was something you simply had to do. 

“Lee.. can we go back to the apartment, I’m still tired from the hospital,” You asked him while you stayed in each other's arms for what seemed like an eternity. Lee’s chest slowed with every breath, you could tell he was calming down. The rain continued relentlessly, your clothes were already soaked, and so was your face — it would have been if it weren’t raining regardless. 

You felt Lee nod against your shoulder. He was tearing apart at the seams, and you knew it and he knew it. He was begging you to stay, and you were going to listen. This time you would. 

He helped you get up, ever the gentleman.

The walk back to the apartment was solemn and silent, despite the sound of rain hitting the roads, and the vacant streets of Richfield seemed somehow even more empty. Neither of you were sure what to say, or perhaps it was the thought of cracking in front of the other. You felt like you had betrayed Lee in some way, and Lee could tell, that didn’t mean you couldn’t make things right. Lee needed you more than Arthur did. And as much as you wanted to run straight back to Arthur, you simply couldn’t, Lee could not stand on his own for much longer if you left. It hurt, badly, like even the thought of it would burn you inside out, starting from your heart and the thick tendrils of smoke would suffocate you. Love was strange like that. 

Maybe it was a selfish thought, that if you had never met Lee all of this could be avoided. Arthur would have found you, and you would not have to go through this process of picking and choosing. You could live with Lee, it was true, but your heart would belong to Arthur. As much as you tried to convince yourself it didn’t, the way his face would appear in the crowds, or the convincing yourself that Arthur was a mere afterthought. But truth be told, you ran from the outlaw life, Arthur never left. You loved Lee, you did, you didn’t regret dating him, you simply dreamed of bypassing all this heartache. 

When you finally arrived back at the store, Arthur had already left. You walked up the rickety old steps onto the top floor, remembering how it felt when Lee asked you out all those months ago. It was bittersweet.

But first you would sleep, somehow all that talking kept you awake, when in truth you were still bonetired. You were sure Lee was tired too. So much had happened in the last few days, yet it still felt so far away.

You went into the bathroom with a fresh change of clothes and stared into the mirror, examining each bandage and bruise. It was incredibly foolish and impulsive to leave like that. That wolf could have easily killed you. 

When you changed and left the bathroom, you nearly collapsed into the bed, crawling over to your side. Lee sat on the edge of the bed facing away from you, his hands intertwined in his lap, in deep thought. You stared at him for a few moments before he sighed and fell back into the bed next to you. 

He stared into your eyes for a moment, like he wanted to say something but couldn’t bring himself to. He leaned over and kissed you softly, his thumb tracing your jawline. 

“We’ll talk about the rest of this later, okay? I know we’re both tired.” 

You nodded and pulled the blankets over both of you and nuzzled up to Lee. You could not shake the feeling of betrayal and pain, but at least in Lee’s arms it felt a little better. 

•••

When you woke it was dark out. The lights were off in the apartment. You felt Lee beside you, your back to his chest. If you were quiet enough, you could say goodbye to Arthur. When you built up the courage to slide out of Lee’s arms, Lee shifted and you cursed yourself. You owed Arthur an apology, and a goodbye, but the thought of letting Lee know where you were going felt like a crime, like you weren’t supposed to be even speaking to Arthur anymore. 

After a few moments, you decided it was safe to leave. You knew that Arthur was staying in town at the hotel on your street, but not the exact room. 

You walked slowly over to the doorstep, the wood creaked and moaned underneath your feet. Every groan made you flinch, as you carefully made it to the door. 

“Where are you going?” Lee asked from behind you. You froze at the sound of his groggy voice, and you slowly turned to him, afraid to confess. It felt wrong to lie to him, it felt wrong to sneak behind his back, but you knew it would be the right thing to let Arthur go. 

You took a deep breath, your head bowed in shame, “I’m going to say goodbye to Arthur.” 

Lee sat up straighter and cleared his throat. “Goodbye?” He asked. 

“I can’t leave you, Lee.”

A part of Lee’s head was screaming to let you leave Arthur, but deep down he knew it wasn’t right. He wanted to be selfish, he wanted you all to himself, from now until the day he dies. He wanted you to choose him for the right reasons. 

“You know I love you, right?” Lee said. You couldn’t see his face. 

“I know.” 

“I won’t force you to stay. I know you love Arthur. And I’ve accepted that.” Lee averted his eyes from your face, even though he couldn’t see you. 

You leaned against the door, trying to calm yourself. 

“You asked me to stay.” 

“I did. But I know you want Arthur, as much as it hurts to say this, but I think you need to go with him.” 

“I love you  _ and _ Arthur,” You responded, trying to stop your voice from cracking. 

“And Arthur had you first. I just can’t steal you from him like that.” 

“You’re not stealing me from him, Lee. I want you.” You tried to convince yourself this was the truth, you wanted Lee, in some other world perhaps you could have gotten him with no complications, but in this one you couldn’t. 

“I just.. I can’t have you choose me out of pity,” Lee told you. 

Your silence was enough. He was right. 

“Both of us have gotten the short end of the stick in this life.. and that’s why I won’t stop you from what you really want.” 

“How do you know what I want?” You asked, your brow furrowed. 

“I see the way you look at him. I saw you kiss him. I know you want him, (Y/N).” Lee got off the bed and hesitantly walked over to you, like each step closer to you would cause you to crumble. And it was true. The closer he got, the harder it was to contain your emotions. 

“But I can’t leave you.” Lee was right in front of you, you could nearly feel his heartbeat, your chests almost touching. 

“I’ll be fine, sweetheart. I will.” Lee broke your heart twice in one day. And you have broken his many times more. 

“I’m so sorry, Lee. I never wanted this.” You felt weirdly shattered, almost like the pieces of yourself had already broken, but you were being put back together at the same time. 

“I know.” 

Lee leaned forward and gave you a comforting hug, his hands rubbing your back soothingly. Lee was kind enough like that. He was strong, he was caring, he was emotional, he was judgemental, he was silly, he was outspoken, he was open. Lee was the man who taught you to love again. Lee was a storm, and he was the calm summer days, the lapping of waves and sunrises. He taught you that love was a thing that always would come back to you, no matter how grim things look. Love never leaves, it starts as a seed in the cold winter, and grows in spring, blossoming in summer. Love is a cycle. Love is a new beginning. Love is rebirth. 

“Thank you for teaching me what love is,” Lee said into your shoulder. You pulled away from him and stared into his dark brown eyes. In some way, you imagined Lee’s eyes would never leave you. Perhaps one day his laugh would, or the exact shade of his hair, but his eyes would be forever held in your heart as a reminder of the lessons he had taught you. Love was strange like that. 

“I want you to keep something, Lee, as a reminder,” You said, pulling off the locket from your neck. You opened it and removed Lee and Arthur’s photo from it, and placed the necklace in his hand. 

“I want you to put who you love in here. So they’ll stay with you forever. So you’ll never forget them,” You told him. He picked the locket up and examined it in his hand. 

“Anastasia and my father and my mother.” 

You smiled. “I’m sure they’re all proud of you.” 

Lee smiled and nodded. “Thank you. But you need to get going soon, I’m sure Arthur is waiting.” 

“I’m going to miss this place,” You proclaimed, resting your hand on the wooden doorway, feeling the old wood and chipped paint. 

“Richfield or the general store?” 

“Both.” 

“They both have their charms.” There was something so natural between you and Lee, regardless of what had just happened. 

“But I need to get going. It’s late,” You reminded him. Lee stepped away from you and gave you a bittersweet smile. 

“Goodbye, (Y/N),” Lee spoke. 

“Thank you, Lee. Goodbye.” You opened the door and walked out, down the steps to the first platform. Feeling your old life slip away from you again, this time you welcomed it with open arms. There were no more outlaws, there was simply you and Arthur now. But first, you needed to pay someone a visit. 

You knocked on Mr. Rinascita’s door. “May I come in?”

“Yes,” You heard Lee’s father hum weakly. You opened the door and walked in, letting your eyes fall to Mr. Rinascita at the table reading a book. He looked even sicker than he had a few days before. 

You weren’t sure where to start. “Mr. Rinascita.. I won’t be here to take care of Lee anymore.. so I have to leave that up to you,” You sighed. 

“Lee told you then?” He asked. 

You nodded, “He did. And he’s the reason you should keep fighting.”

“Then I’ll have to ask him to go the pharmacy tomorrow,” Mr. Rinascita claimed. You sighed a breath of relief. 

“Thank you.. take care of your son for me, okay?” You asked him, walking backwards towards the door. 

“I will. And goodbye Miss (L/N). Thank you for working for us.” You had expected some protest from Mr. Rinascita, but you didn’t complain at the lack of. You would miss Lee’s father. The wise old man. 

When you walked down to the final step of the staircase, you felt like you could cry. The general store was a memory filled place, it almost felt like leaving the store was like leaving a friend. You walked over to the register and remembered Lee’s lips on yours when he kissed you. You took a candy off the dish next to the register and popped it in your mouth. When you made it to the door, you whispered a small goodbye, to the world you knew, and a hello to the one you were returning to. 

•••

It wasn’t hard to find Arthur at the hotel. You knocked on his door and he let you in. You nearly jumped into his arms. 

“Let’s go home, right now,” You said into his shoulder. 

“You sure? What about Lee?” Arthur thought he had heard you wrong. 

“Lee wanted me to go with you. And I want to go with you.” 

“You do?” Arthur pulled away, looking at you with confusion in his face. 

“Of course I do, you big oaf.” You giggled. 

“Then let’s go, right now. I don’t want to wait any longer. Was starting to get sick of this city,” Arthur exclaimed, neither of you unable to hide your excitement. 

•••

The next day you were boarding a train to Valentine, a city you had never thought you would be returning to. Lee had brought your stuff to the hotel so you could pick them up when you left. 

The platform was crowded when you arrived. The chatter of families and businessmen alike was loud. Arthur held your hand tightly, like he was afraid to lose you again. But this time he wouldn’t. You would make sure of it. 

The conductor shouted all aboard and the passengers began to enter the train. A lot of the people in the crowd were still waiting for the second train to arrive, so truly, your train wasn’t crowded at all. Arthur and you found a seat, with you taking the window. 

After a few moments, the train began. You looked out into the crowd and noticed a familiar face. Even in a crowd of hundreds you could still spot him. Lee smiled at you knowingly and waved as the train moved quicker and quicker. You waved back, wishing Lee all the best. In some other life, you imagined there was a version that did end up with Lee, an ending that came with little complications. You would have married Lee, had children, and have your children work at the store, and one day they would continue your and Lee’s legacy there, or perhaps start one of their own. 

You loved Lee, you truly did. And wished him only the best things in life, Lee deserved it. 

The further the train went from Richfield, the more you dreamed of the life you would have with Arthur, the one you had always wanted. You never wanted to escape Arthur, you only wanted to escape that life, and you welcomed the city life with open arms, but now you were where you were supposed to be. With the man you had vowed yourself to a year ago. 

That life you had lived such a few hours ago felt much more distant now, as if every mile was pushing that memory further and further away. 

Hours passed, and you leaned against Arthur’s shoulder while he scribbled in his journal. The sun was setting to the west. Sunsets belonged to you and Arthur. Just like nearly everything had. From now until forever, from sickness and in health, Arthur was yours. 

•••

  
  
  
  
  



	17. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it. This is the end. I wrote a little message for all of you to read, it would mean a lot if you did. 
> 
> When I began this story a few days after Christmas, I wrote it on a whim. The story brewed in my mind for perhaps a max week before I began writing it. The original idea was inspired a lot by Big Fish the Musical, the musical I was in, in early December. I remember I used to write day after day and could get a chapter up daily, until around the sixth or seventh chapter. I can’t quite tell you how I did it, but I know if I hadn’t gotten that far so quickly, I would have never finished this story, it would have been added to my never ending pile of unfinished WIP’s. The Ballads of Rebirth was supposed to go in an entirely different direction that I had planned, Lee and Arthur’s feud was supposed to be way worse and bitter, and would have ended up with Arthur beating up Lee. Lee was supposed to be much more of an antagonist in the final chapters, a way worse of a person, but I couldn’t do it to him. In many ways, he was flawed, he was selfish at times and quick to judge, but he was still loving and goofy. I know people were not going to like him, they were rooting for Arthur after all. But I still love Lee, he was my first official rdr2 oc, my first fully fleshed out character. Quite frankly, I didn’t really ‘know’ who he was until I continued writing it, I had no personality built out for him until I began writing, and I just chose what felt right. That’s what happens with a lot of my stories, I write what feels right (which usually leads to plot holes because I don’t write shit down). But regardless, I love Lee, and I hope you’re satisfied with the ending I gave him.
> 
> There were a few times that I thought about giving up, that my story was absolute shit, that my plot holes were too confusing and my narrative was weak, and I was close to quitting. Until people began asking me when the new chapters would be out, what would happen next. While the numbers may be small, the dedication is what kept me going. And yeah, maybe my story isn’t the biggest rdr2 fic, maybe it’s not talked about in discord servers, but I don’t care, all that matters is that the fans that have stayed have shown me that I should continue writing, that there are people rooting for this story. I know, my story is full of plot holes, I know people don’t like Lee (which I’ll forever be bitter about), I know my story has grammatical errors, I know maybe I shouldn’t have killed off Mahala, I know there’s a lot I could have done, but there’s a lot I still did. As much as I think my story is weak, I’m still proud of the fact that I made it, that it is my own, that I created it and stuck through. 
> 
> Sometimes, it’s not about what you could have done, it’s what you did. And that’s more valuable in many ways. Creating anything is powerful, and The Ballads of Rebirth taught me that. 
> 
> So thank you, to every commentator, every person who left a like or kudo, every person who left an ask in my inbox, and especially everyone who complimented my writing style (which is apparently unique? and also these comments are a huge ego boost to me so if I’m cocky, it’s those peoples fault). Thank you for sticking with me, and I hope you enjoyed what I made. 
> 
> I know I did. 
> 
> ••
> 
> Here Are Some Songs That Inspired This Story: 
> 
> 1\. Setting Sun - Lord Huron (Main inspiration) 
> 
> 2\. Prologue - Starry (What I consider to be the main theme) 
> 
> 3\. Sunlight and Storms - Starry (Inspiration for Lee and Reader’s relationship)
> 
> 4\. The Road - Starry (yeah.. I know there’s lots of Starry, but regardless, Arthur’s arc inspiration)
> 
> 5\. After The War - Stars (wow lots of star-esque things, Epilogue inspiration, I recommend listening to it while reading this) 
> 
> •••
> 
> PS. The AU ending will be posted with the main story, as I realized many of you may not see it otherwise.

Time passed quickly and solemnly. Life was peaceful and quiet. And you loved every second of it. After you and Arthur had left Richfield in search of the life you had lost, you and your husband had found it with Charles, in a small cottage down the road from him. Charles was happy to see you and Arthur returned to him. 

And life was quiet, for a long time it was. You heard nothing of Micah and Dutch, the Pinkerton’s had stopped searching, it seemed the outlaw way had died out long ago too. You were scared Arthur or you would somehow slip back into it. you would blink and suddenly be pulled back into the life you so desperately tried to avoid, but the pull never came. The older you got, the lesser and lesser that percentage became. 

The people of Wapiti had long since moved. You visited Mahala’s grave frequently, and thanked her for bringing Arthur back to you. You were sure you would have liked her. 

You thanked Charles too, for being quick to find him. It was strange to think that without Charles’ swift action, Arthur would not be here today. Instead, you would be visiting his grave instead of Mahala’s. 

John was exceptionally pleased to hear Arthur was still alive. Abigail wrote frequently to you for many years, you missed her dearly, but you had faith you would be reunited once more.

“Honey?” You called out to the doorway behind you. 

“G’morning. I got what you asked me to pick up,” Arthur replied. You looked over your shoulder and smiled at him. He placed the box down at the table. 

“Thank you. Breakfast is almost ready,” You said, scrambling some eggs on top of the stove. Arthur came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist. 

“Someone’s touchy today,” You laughed, shaking your head. 

“Missed you.” He nuzzled his face into your neck. 

“You were gone for a day.” 

“I’m not allowed to miss my dear wife?” He pretended to sound hurt. 

“Not when you’re distracting me,” You replied nonchalantly, continuing to prepare the omelettes.

Arthur laughed heartily in your ear. “I give up then,” he said, removing his hold from your waist and putting his hands up in defeat. 

“It’s almost ready, sit down.” You put the finishing touches on the omelettes and put them on plates. Arthur sat down at the small table while you fetched some forks. You stared through the window while your hands grabbed two forks, seeing the daffodils on the window, Arthur had bought for you a few days earlier. 

You walked over to the table and set down the two plates, taking a seat across from Arthur. He grabbed at the plate hungrily and began to eat. 

“You sure are hungry.” 

“Starvin’. Been a day since I’ve had your lovely cooking,” Arthur smiled at you. You picked up your fork as well and began to eat. 

“I forgot the coffee, hold on.” You realized after a few moments and walked over to the countertop to fetch the pot of coffee, pouring two cups for Arthur and you. You made yours how you liked it, and brought cream and sugar over to Arthur. 

“Thank you,” He replied to the gesture, grabbing his cup. He put in a few spoonfuls of sugar and some cream, always the one with the sweet tooth. 

You sipped your coffee while you ate your breakfast, glancing out towards the front windows. It was a nice day out, clear of clouds with a nice breeze. The garden still needed tending to, but at least later you could sit on the porch with Arthur. 

“I invited Charles over for dinner tonight, by the way. I’m making roast beef and potatoes, and maybe an apple pie, I haven’t decided yet,” You shrugged. 

“Make blueberry.” Arthur replied, picking up a newspaper from yesterday that was on the table. 

“Blueberries aren’t in season.” 

“Okay, then raspberry.”

“Not in season either.” 

“Really? Well shit. Apple will have to do then.” 

“You don’t like my apple pies?” 

“What? No, I do! You just make them a lot. I feel like we’re having them every week,” Arthur laughed nervously.

You pretended to glare at him, “Then I’ll never make another apple pie again. You’re getting pie with no filling in all of them now.” 

“Now I didn’t say that! I’m just saying, you make apple pies a lot, I like variety sometimes.”

“You lived with the gang for 20 years and ate the same stew for every meal but you’re complaining about me making apple pie once a week?” You raised your eyebrow at him. 

“That’s why I like variety now. Couldn’t have it for so long, that once I get it I’ll never go back to eating the same thing.” 

“Mhm.” You dragged out the sound, nodding sarcastically. 

You stared at Arthur, he stared at you, a slight smile on his lips. “Just admit you don’t like my apple pies.” 

“Would it make you happy if I said that?” 

“No. Yes. Maybe. I don’t know!” 

“Listen, I like your apple pies, honestly. I just like some variety, that’s all,” He said, attempting to quell your fake anger. 

“I’m never making an apple pie ever again,” You replied dramatically, slumping onto the table, reaching your hands out to hold his. 

Arthur chucked at your dramatics. 

“Just eat your omelette.” 

  
•••

You thought of Lee frequently. Not that you yearned for him, or missed him, you simply wondered how he was doing. And in a way, he had heard your thoughts, after about two years of silence from him, Lee sent a letter. 

“You have a letter,” Arthur had said one night when he came back from town, placing the letter on the table in front of you. 

“Who’s it from?” 

“Lee.” 

“Lee sent me a letter?” You asked in disbelief, grabbing the envelope and examining the name on the front. Leroy Rinascita. Clear as day. 

_ (Y/N),  _

_ It’s been quite some time since you left Richfield. I hope this letter finds you well. I took a chance and sent a letter to Valentine, a city Arthur had mentioned to me before, so if I don’t hear from you, I assume you’re somewhere else off in the country.  _

_ I hope you’re pleased with the choices you made. How is Arthur, by the way? I know we started off on the wrong foot (for good reason) but overall I found him to be a good, kind man. I can tell Arthur makes a good husband. I pray he’s not too angry with how I acted earlier towards him, water under the bridge, right?  _

_ I apologize for not sending a letter sooner, or perhaps I’m sorry for even writing this, in case you find this letter strange. I just wanted to know how you are doing. I’m doing well too. I’ve found someone as well who I enjoy very much, they live with me now. I guess you can say we got married, about two months ago actually. It wasn’t a conventional marriage of course. You actually already met them. I’m not sure you would expect who, but for the sake of prying eyes, I won’t reveal who they are in this letter. Other than marriage, life’s been pretty normal. The general store is doing well, there’s some new projects in the city too. A new candy store opened by the pier after the old one unfortunately burned down a few months after you had left. Richfield is bigger now, I feel like it’ll never stop growing. More and more people show up everyday. I barely even know the neighbors names these days.  _

_ As for my father, I’m pleased to say he’s still kicking. Somehow, the cancer went away, I couldn’t tell you how, the doctors can’t either. I’m really grateful for you convincing him to stay alive, to stay for me.  _

_ Your locket is still with me, I found an old family photo of my father, my mother and Anastasia as a newborn. It was strange to see my mother’s face after so many years, I had nearly forgotten it. I have an older photo of Anastasia too on the other side, my partner isn’t in the locket, only because I see them daily. I don’t need to be reminded that I love them.  _

_ But enough talk of me, how are you doing? I know it’s been a while, but I still care about you, and hope to know you’re doing well. Give Arthur a hello for me as well.  _

_ Regards,  _

_ Lee _

You were happy to know Lee still cared, in some horrible nightmare you imagined that he despised you, that you were simply a dark phase in his life. And you were even happier that Lee had found someone and was truly living the life he had wanted. In a way, you were the same as him, both yearning for peace and quiet. 

“Lee’s been doing well. I’m glad he sent this letter, he says hello to you, Arthur,” You told him, setting the letter down on the table. 

“Good. I’m glad Lee’s doing okay.” 

“Yeah, me too.” 

•••

Even though Beecher’s Hope had many people living off its land, it did not feel crowded. Perhaps it was the sky that made it feel that way, the sky was endless, and when you and your family worked underneath it, it did not feel so small. The sky was infinite. 

“Jack, will you go get Anne for me? She’s out by the chicken coop,” You had told the teenager. 

“Sure thing, Aunt (Y/N),” He replied, walking towards the front door to fetch Anne for dinner. Although the Marston and Morgan houses were separate, the two families had practically lived in both. Jack was eating over for dinner, John and Abigail claiming you as his babysitter. Not that he needed one — or perhaps Uncle did. 

“Arthur? Will you set the table for me, please? I have to go get Anne washed up once Jack brings her in,” You called out to Arthur behind you.

“Sure.” Arthur responded, he picked up the dishes next to you and began placing them on the table. 

As you finished up cooking, you heard the shrill voice of Anne calling out to you. You immediately swiveled around as her tiny legs bounced up to you. 

“There’s my little one!” You said joyously, she wrapped her arms around your leg and giggled. She was a near carbon copy of Arthur. She had his nose, his eyes, his mouth shape, but she had your hair and complexion. Regardless of who she looked more like — she was yours. 

“Mama! I brought you a feather from the chicken coop!” She reached into her tiny dress pocket and pulled out a white feather. It was bigger and heavier than a chicken feather, you wondered what type of bird it was. 

“Sorry, Uncle Arthur, she kind of made a mess in the chicken coop,” You heard Jack say to Arthur. 

“You did? Oh thank you, sweetie.” You beamed at her, she watched you take it with big proud eyes. You placed the feather in your pocket, it’s long feathers sticking out. 

“You’re welcome, mama.” You noticed the dirt on her face and on her knees as she said that. You scooped her up in your arms and took her into the bathroom to wash up. 

You set her down next to the sink and began washing her knees with a wet washcloth. 

“Mommy?” 

“Yes?” You hummed, continuing to scrub the dirt off her knees. 

“When is the baby coming?” 

“Not for a couple more months.” 

“Daddy thinks it’ll be a boy,” She told you matter of factly. 

“Daddy thinks lots of things.” 

“He told me he’s sure about this one.” 

“When did daddy say that?” You asked, dipping the washcloth under the water, beginning to wipe the dirt off her cute face. 

“Today. He told me while we were looking for flowers for you.” 

“Okay, well, what else did he say?” 

“He said he wants to name the baby Henry Hosea.” 

You blinked at the name. Henry Hosea did sound nice. After all, Hosea was technically your adoptive father, as well as Arthur’s. Neither of you had really ever brought him up, avoiding that painful topic entirely. And Anne knew nothing of your past occupations, it was a story for another time, when she was older.

“I like the name Hosea,” Anne responded after being met by your silence. 

“It’s a nice name,” Your voice nearly breaking. You subdued the tears in your eyes, after all that conversation was for another time. 

When you finished cleaning Anne up, you brought her to dinner and sat her down next to Jack. You brought the food out to the table, making sure to put the apple pie right in front of Arthur.

•••

In many ways, time had been kind to you. It had been patient and nurturing, time allowed you a second chance at life. 

It had given you the life you had wanted, one full of peace, love and family. Your life was quiet at Beecher’s Hope, filled with no revenge story. Time had dragged out your lesson for many years, but now you were reaping the fruits of your labor. 

So now, as you cradle your newborn son, watching Anne and Arthur play in the field, her giggles dancing over the grass. You thank time for being there for you. For giving you what you wanted, for letting you learn to grow. For giving you a family. For returning Arthur to you.

In many ways you were thankful, thankful for the lessons you had learned, thankful for the house you lived in, thankful for the food on your table. Thankful for Mahala, thankful for Lee, thankful for Anne, thankful for Arthur and thankful for your son, Henry Hosea. 

A cool breeze swept over the field, causing the grass and flowers to dance in the wind. Anne began to pretend she was a bird and Arthur raced around trying to catch her, both laughing in unison. 

You looked down at your newborn son, his eyes closed over his resting face. 

“One day I’ll tell you where your name comes from. I’ll tell you all about the life your daddy and I lived. And I’ll tell you about the life I had after that, and I’ll tell you about why I’ll never go back to either. One day I’ll tell you all about it,” You said quietly to your son, a promise to him and time, and no one else. 

And in the end there was a man and a woman, and a daughter and a son, living to the world, thankful for every moment they get to spend with each other. 

And Mother Nature rejoiced, for the man on the mountain and the woman in the city had found each other. 

••• The End ••• 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, truly. I appreciate you being here. 
> 
> P.S.S — Lee is bi for Officer Clark!


End file.
